CHAPTER 1
Finding a good bar is like finding a good barber or an honest mechanic. You have to search around for awhile. You’ll have take a lot of crap and fork over your money with a smile, more times than you’ll ever care to admit. And afterward you’ll always end up feeling like you just shared your first night in a prison cell with some violent bull dyke three times your size. But when you finally find it…when you finally walk into that room that just makes you smile. That’s when you’ve made it.
That my friend, is when you’ll drink with impunity. These are the type of places where you’ll start out by making out with some foreign chick. Then later in the evening find yourself in the middle of an argument with an ex Raiders linebacker for some unknown reason and somehow always end up teleporting to a parking lot with the messy leftovers of two tacos all over your shirt.
Raul “Grande” Lopez knew about those type of bars. Hell, he owned one of those type of bars. Probably the best one in Old Downtown. He had spent most of his younger days watching his father drink himself to a bitter and early grave and was now spending the latter years watching complete strangers do the same. Life is funny like that sometimes. You move something here, you change something there and you think you’ve escaped your worst fear, but it turns out you’ve done nothing but make a nice little nest for it . In his 51 years Grande had heard and seen just about everything. He could tell you stories you wouldn’t believe. There was the time where some blond girl got carried away and after smashing her glass into someone’s head she fended off the bouncers with a pool stick. Grande has the pictures to prove it, which are still taped to the side of the register. He’ll tell you how once, during an argument, one guy sprinted across the bar, lumped into the air and knocked the other out with a kick to the throat. At another instance, some poor sap had been drinking heavily and had spent most of the night dancing and cuddling with this girl, all of a sudden the guy scrambles to the bar asks for a double shot, gulps it down then relates that the girl turned out to have been a guy. So when Damaz Sanchez showed up that particular night out of breath and bleeding lightly from the nose, his biggest question was “so did you beat his ***?”
“Let me a have shot of Sauza gold and a bud light”
The bartender immediately complied with the shot and was already reaching for the beer. Damaz quickly gulped it and received his bottle of light. “Thanks, Big”
The old man behind the counter was a barrel chested mammoth with hands that were as limber in their age as they were massive. He had a wide forehead, a thick mustache and black, graying hair which was still full and always gracefully combed back. His eyes were centered close together in the fashion of most of all of Gods natural predators. And in the corner of both were enough wrinkles to tell you he was a man who subscribed to Dean martin’s idea that if you couldn’t laugh anymore then you might as well dig a hole and have them throw dirt on you. He was known by most of the population on this side of the bridge simply as “Grande” or “Big” He was a man who didn’t actually belong in Old Dowtown but could never actually find a good enough reason to move out.
“So?”
“Excuse me?” Damaz was startled out of his trance by the question. He took a sip out of his beer.
“did you beat his ***?”
“What? Oh,” he shook his head as if clearing out the spider webs. “Uh yeah, sure did.” for the first time in the night he smiled.In the mood for a short intro on an alcoholic?I think the %26quot;foreign chick%26quot; remark is fine because it's in context. This is a story about a drunk, after all. It wouldn't very well fit the tone if he said %26quot;proper lady%26quot; now, would it?
Very well-written and edgy (I'll disregard the formatting because this is yahoo). I like it. Write some more.In the mood for a short intro on an alcoholic?OK... thanks.In the mood for a short intro on an alcoholic?not too bad. early on its spoilt by saying foreign chick. always try and avoid calling women chicks unless its someone speaking and its the way they speak. but you write well.
please answer mine
http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind…
Friday, June 3, 2011
Diet and exercise for stomach and thighs?
Heres my goal: get a flat stomach and nice thighs by Christmas.
Only problem is I don’t know how to do it.
I already only eat when Im hungry and fruit is my absolute favourite food, although theres not much in the house at the moment.
I don’t eat fatty bits on any meat, and the meat I eat most is chicken.
I have soccer training on Sundays and a light game on Mondays. Apart from horse riding I don’t do any other exercise, which needs to change – except I have fallen arches so cant go running on anything but grass. I don’t have a pool or any gym equipment. I have a bike but its no fun.
Can anybody help me with some diet and exercise ideas to help me achieve this? I was thinking maybe walking every day – I have no idea how far – along with some core strength exercises morning and night. I don’t know about diet, but ideas on some good healthy foods to stock up on for snacks would be really good.Diet and exercise for stomach and thighs?VARSITY FIGHTER STOLE THIS FROM ME!
Womensworkoutguide.com is the greatest excercise website for women who want to gain or lose weight.
Their diet system is normal and is available under the site for free but if you don't want to check it there here it is
HEALTHY EATING TIPS
Most people will agree that there is more weight loss and fitness information today but there is also more and more people that are getting even more confused about proper nutrition. Each diet contradicts with one another. I know it can get very confusing.
I will provide you with a great guideline to help you lose weight. Let me simply it for you. These are the guidelines that I am following in my 16 week journey to six pack abs.
Rule #1: Eat smaller meals through out day.
Ideally, try to eat every 3- 31/2 hours of a smaller meal everyday. Not only will you feel less hungry but it will help boost your metabolism by constantly supplying your body with the adequate amount of “energy.” Stay away from eating 3 larger meals and start eating smaller meals through out the day.
Rule#2: Consume enough high quality protein every day.
Protein (such as chicken) has a high thermic effect than carbs and fat. What does it mean to you? Your body has to burn extra calories to break down your protein into smaller amino acids. Plus, it will keep you satisfied a lot longer compared to carbs. In addition, protein is needed to build and maintain lean muscle.
Rule#3: Consume 25-35 grams of fiber a day
Your carbohydrates should be mostly high fiber foods such as vegetables, fruit, and high fiber unrefined grains. Fiber in your food absorbs water causing it to expand in your stomach and therefore making you feel more satisfied for a longer time. In addition, high fiber food will also control your blood sugar level; therefore, allowing you to release more body fat.
Rule#4: Avoid refined sugars and refined grains.
One of the biggest reasons why we are so overweight is because of the amount of sugar intake that we consume every year (Yes. That means to put your soda down). High sugary food/drink intake can cause your blood sugar to spike up causing you body to stop producing another hormone called glucagon. Glucagon is a releasing hormone that is responsible for releasing body fat to be utilized as energy. However, when you consume too much sugar, your glucagon production is discontinued.
Rule#5: Consume an adequate amount of fat.
When I say fat, I meant the healthy kind of fat such as nuts and seeds, nut butters, olive oil, organic meats and eggs, virgin coconut oil, and avocados. Depleting yourself with the healthy fat can negatively affect your hormone levels that will only result to more cravings.
In addition, you want to limit the unhealthy fat (saturated fat) such as butter, margarine, and the fat around your steak. Avoid hydrogenated fat at all costs as they cause more harm than good.
Rule#6: Keep yourself hydrated all day;
It is crucial to keep yourself hydrated especially while working out. Try to drink .6 - .7 ounces per pound of body weight. We are made up of mostly water and a slight decrease in your body fluid level can affect your exercise performance. My number one rule in regards to water: If you are thirsty, you are also dehydrated. Do NOT wait until you are thirsty.
I am not a nutritionist and I do NOT claim to know everything. However, I’ve spent over 7 years of my life studying how the body functions. These are just the general guidelines that I use for myself.
Below is a chart that I made for you. These are my basic meals. In each meal, I consume a lean protein (i.e chicken breast), Starch Carbs (i.e brown rice), and fibrous carbs (i.e. broccoli).
Lean Proteins
Eggs Whites Chicken breast Tuna
Shrimp Grouper Mahi-mahi
Cod Salmon Swordfish
Lobster Shellfish Sushi/ sashimi
Halibut Marlin Cobia
Wahoo Tofu (Soy)
Starchy Carbs
Potato Cream of Rice Cereal Corn
Brown rice Tomato Jasmine Rice
Sweet potato Basmati rice Peas
Couscous Oatmeal Corn tortillas
Fibrous Carbs
Broccoli Onions Cauliflower
Asparagus Carrots Spinach
Green peppers String beans Yellow peppers
Cucumbers Red peppers Celery
Mushrooms Jerusalem artichoke
Sample Menu #1
Meal # 1
2 egg whites
1.5 Cup high fiber (low sugar) cereal
? cup milk
? cup cranberry juice
Meal # 2
1 ounce of Almonds
1 medium Orange
Meal # 3
3 ounces Chicken Breast
1 cup of mixed vegetables
1 Large Apple
Meal # 4 (My post workout meal)
1 Banana
1 scoop protein powder
(22grams protein, 5g
carbs, 1 g fat)
Meal #5
? cup of brown rice
? cup Asparagus
3 ounces Turkey Breast or Salmon
1.5 cups lettuce
2 tsps olive oil dressing
Sample Menu #2
Meal # 1
6 egg whites
? cup oatmeal (measured dry uncooked)
1 small orange
Meal # 2
1 ounce of Almonds
1 mediumi can't find my scan domain names
Only problem is I don’t know how to do it.
I already only eat when Im hungry and fruit is my absolute favourite food, although theres not much in the house at the moment.
I don’t eat fatty bits on any meat, and the meat I eat most is chicken.
I have soccer training on Sundays and a light game on Mondays. Apart from horse riding I don’t do any other exercise, which needs to change – except I have fallen arches so cant go running on anything but grass. I don’t have a pool or any gym equipment. I have a bike but its no fun.
Can anybody help me with some diet and exercise ideas to help me achieve this? I was thinking maybe walking every day – I have no idea how far – along with some core strength exercises morning and night. I don’t know about diet, but ideas on some good healthy foods to stock up on for snacks would be really good.Diet and exercise for stomach and thighs?VARSITY FIGHTER STOLE THIS FROM ME!
Womensworkoutguide.com is the greatest excercise website for women who want to gain or lose weight.
Their diet system is normal and is available under the site for free but if you don't want to check it there here it is
HEALTHY EATING TIPS
Most people will agree that there is more weight loss and fitness information today but there is also more and more people that are getting even more confused about proper nutrition. Each diet contradicts with one another. I know it can get very confusing.
I will provide you with a great guideline to help you lose weight. Let me simply it for you. These are the guidelines that I am following in my 16 week journey to six pack abs.
Rule #1: Eat smaller meals through out day.
Ideally, try to eat every 3- 31/2 hours of a smaller meal everyday. Not only will you feel less hungry but it will help boost your metabolism by constantly supplying your body with the adequate amount of “energy.” Stay away from eating 3 larger meals and start eating smaller meals through out the day.
Rule#2: Consume enough high quality protein every day.
Protein (such as chicken) has a high thermic effect than carbs and fat. What does it mean to you? Your body has to burn extra calories to break down your protein into smaller amino acids. Plus, it will keep you satisfied a lot longer compared to carbs. In addition, protein is needed to build and maintain lean muscle.
Rule#3: Consume 25-35 grams of fiber a day
Your carbohydrates should be mostly high fiber foods such as vegetables, fruit, and high fiber unrefined grains. Fiber in your food absorbs water causing it to expand in your stomach and therefore making you feel more satisfied for a longer time. In addition, high fiber food will also control your blood sugar level; therefore, allowing you to release more body fat.
Rule#4: Avoid refined sugars and refined grains.
One of the biggest reasons why we are so overweight is because of the amount of sugar intake that we consume every year (Yes. That means to put your soda down). High sugary food/drink intake can cause your blood sugar to spike up causing you body to stop producing another hormone called glucagon. Glucagon is a releasing hormone that is responsible for releasing body fat to be utilized as energy. However, when you consume too much sugar, your glucagon production is discontinued.
Rule#5: Consume an adequate amount of fat.
When I say fat, I meant the healthy kind of fat such as nuts and seeds, nut butters, olive oil, organic meats and eggs, virgin coconut oil, and avocados. Depleting yourself with the healthy fat can negatively affect your hormone levels that will only result to more cravings.
In addition, you want to limit the unhealthy fat (saturated fat) such as butter, margarine, and the fat around your steak. Avoid hydrogenated fat at all costs as they cause more harm than good.
Rule#6: Keep yourself hydrated all day;
It is crucial to keep yourself hydrated especially while working out. Try to drink .6 - .7 ounces per pound of body weight. We are made up of mostly water and a slight decrease in your body fluid level can affect your exercise performance. My number one rule in regards to water: If you are thirsty, you are also dehydrated. Do NOT wait until you are thirsty.
I am not a nutritionist and I do NOT claim to know everything. However, I’ve spent over 7 years of my life studying how the body functions. These are just the general guidelines that I use for myself.
Below is a chart that I made for you. These are my basic meals. In each meal, I consume a lean protein (i.e chicken breast), Starch Carbs (i.e brown rice), and fibrous carbs (i.e. broccoli).
Lean Proteins
Eggs Whites Chicken breast Tuna
Shrimp Grouper Mahi-mahi
Cod Salmon Swordfish
Lobster Shellfish Sushi/ sashimi
Halibut Marlin Cobia
Wahoo Tofu (Soy)
Starchy Carbs
Potato Cream of Rice Cereal Corn
Brown rice Tomato Jasmine Rice
Sweet potato Basmati rice Peas
Couscous Oatmeal Corn tortillas
Fibrous Carbs
Broccoli Onions Cauliflower
Asparagus Carrots Spinach
Green peppers String beans Yellow peppers
Cucumbers Red peppers Celery
Mushrooms Jerusalem artichoke
Sample Menu #1
Meal # 1
2 egg whites
1.5 Cup high fiber (low sugar) cereal
? cup milk
? cup cranberry juice
Meal # 2
1 ounce of Almonds
1 medium Orange
Meal # 3
3 ounces Chicken Breast
1 cup of mixed vegetables
1 Large Apple
Meal # 4 (My post workout meal)
1 Banana
1 scoop protein powder
(22grams protein, 5g
carbs, 1 g fat)
Meal #5
? cup of brown rice
? cup Asparagus
3 ounces Turkey Breast or Salmon
1.5 cups lettuce
2 tsps olive oil dressing
Sample Menu #2
Meal # 1
6 egg whites
? cup oatmeal (measured dry uncooked)
1 small orange
Meal # 2
1 ounce of Almonds
1 medium
DIET - Not a good eater at all. Help would be much appriciated?
I am 21 and a little overweight. I don't eat nor like fruit, vegetables or any meat apart from chicken. I do light exercise occasionally every few days walking my dog. I enjoy my food very much and yesterday i tried to eat very little. I ate a bowl of cereal, 2 riveta and half a slice of toast with ham. This was only an experiment to see how little food I could eat in one day, and would be impossible to do this on a regular basis. I found myself craving to snack. I don't usually do much exercise in the evening so i would like to stop eating after 7 o'clock, but this may not be possible. I am willing to try my best as i have gained a full stone since last year. I want to cut dairy products completely out of my diet, although i have decided that i will still take milk in my tea as i drink quite a lot of it. I also drink a large amount of alcohol at the weekends, including wine, vodka and beers. Would you advise me to stop this, and do you think this is affecting weight gain? I love to swim, but my local pool is very expensive as it is a private pool, and I cannot afford to spend such money a few days a week.. I would really love to hear your suggestions on what i should do and how i should change my diet, and maybe suggest some foods that are low in fat that i could replace the fatty foods i eat with. Also i would like to add if you think i should cut the alcohol down then what drink is low in calories that you would advise me to drink instead. I thank all who reply deeply and really appriciate you taking the time to read this. xxDIET - Not a good eater at all. Help would be much appriciated?Alcohol makes you fat. It's just a lot of empty calories. Have you ever heard of a beer belly?
It's better for you to eat smaller meals more often. You can eat more earlier in the day so your body has time to burn off what you're eating.
You need to eat fruit and vegetables. There has to be something that you like.
You can walk/run with your dog for exercise. Its free and good for the both of youDIET - Not a good eater at all. Help would be much appriciated?What you ate the other day is not enough, you can not starve yourself because once you finish dieting you will gain it back. You need to change your eating habits and your lifestyle.
Cutting out dairy sounds like a good idea, use soya or rice milk for your tea. Substitute white sugar with brown or honey etc. You need to eat 5 small meals a day so your body , once your sugar levels even out you will stop craving snacks but give yourself about a week before that happens.
If you don't like vegetables you don't have to eat them raw or plainly bolied, start experimenting with food. Thai green vegetable curry (you can add chicken or prawns) is very tasty and healthy, easy to make it at home. I normally cook a big pot of it and it lasts me for 2-3days. Try having soups, they can be very filling and low calories too.
When you walk your dog try running, or even fast walking. Riding a bike burns huge amounts of calories.
As for alcohol stick to vodka, it's still caloric but not as bad as beer or wine.DIET - Not a good eater at all. Help would be much appriciated?http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind
http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind
I'm sorry to be stalking you Megan but I earnestly require your advice and assistance since you have experience marking Language and Literature GCSE scripts.Please reply to the links!
It's better for you to eat smaller meals more often. You can eat more earlier in the day so your body has time to burn off what you're eating.
You need to eat fruit and vegetables. There has to be something that you like.
You can walk/run with your dog for exercise. Its free and good for the both of youDIET - Not a good eater at all. Help would be much appriciated?What you ate the other day is not enough, you can not starve yourself because once you finish dieting you will gain it back. You need to change your eating habits and your lifestyle.
Cutting out dairy sounds like a good idea, use soya or rice milk for your tea. Substitute white sugar with brown or honey etc. You need to eat 5 small meals a day so your body , once your sugar levels even out you will stop craving snacks but give yourself about a week before that happens.
If you don't like vegetables you don't have to eat them raw or plainly bolied, start experimenting with food. Thai green vegetable curry (you can add chicken or prawns) is very tasty and healthy, easy to make it at home. I normally cook a big pot of it and it lasts me for 2-3days. Try having soups, they can be very filling and low calories too.
When you walk your dog try running, or even fast walking. Riding a bike burns huge amounts of calories.
As for alcohol stick to vodka, it's still caloric but not as bad as beer or wine.DIET - Not a good eater at all. Help would be much appriciated?http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind
http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind
I'm sorry to be stalking you Megan but I earnestly require your advice and assistance since you have experience marking Language and Literature GCSE scripts.Please reply to the links!
Noise Song For Tuesday #119?
More rambling.
To anyone.
Now, I assume, I am on a boat. While on this boat I attain a feeling of hopelessness. I just want to assume ambiguity. No topical drivel. No specifics. No topics. Just %26quot;listening%26quot;. I am in the future, sailing past all those who died and die. I am inside a radio, blaring out for you to hear or shut off. I do not care which as long as it is heard at some point for some time. The sun does not beat down, it just stays suspended by its string. I am still a radio. Change the station. I am a television. Change the channel, go ahead. But, every channel will be the same thing: a surreal bombardment of pretention. I am in the icy water, I feel no cold or bitterness. I feel at ease, to be honest. I am swept away by the waves upon a... I am a clock. Or am I? I am not sure. I cannot make important decisions. I am young and I do not know anything. Now, after a vast amount of time in the pool, I need a scarf. Maybe more than one. Sleep may approach. I don't care, I am not excited for anything. The monotony is now beginning to weigh down on me, so I light a candle and hold it up. So what? No buzzing. No fuzz. No harsh crashes. No sudden thrills. I have a uniform now. I do not know why. Apparently I do not know anything. We are in a field, just in the grass. The cameras are rolling, filming this group of people. They act as though they are concerned, but they aren't. It was in the notes, notes, notes, notes. The script. They can actually show no emotion of their own, just other's. Is it possessive? Direction of where to go, what to do, how to do it and why. Why? That is a question we all have been asked before. Is it brilliant? I couldn't care less whether it is or not. I am tired of judging brilliance and merit and such. The rewards. We do not have goals. Charisma could be one. Apathy. We could just relax on the balcony and look at the trees. We could take part in meaningless interviews, day after day. Just sit in a chair while someone asks you pontless questions. They all want money. Need it. We all do. I don't deserve any. I do not deserve any praise or recognition. I don't deserve anything. You all do, but I do not. Take what you want. How are you, the interviewer wants to know. Are you well? What do you think? I thought you were older, so now my thoughts of you will change. I don't deserve anything. I may....
http://www.last.fm/music/Religious+Knive
So...?
*excuse any mispellings, errors, this, that, these, those, whatever.Noise Song For Tuesday #119?we were talking about how i didnt know any modern free jazz musicians yesterday, well on jeff mangum's radio show he mentioned this bassist, peter kowald, and said he saw him with the peter bauer quartet and it was the best live show he ever attended, then he played a recording -amazing-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aluSEsE76
that wasnt it, but that's the first youtube video that came up for peter kowald
jeff mangum gives me new reasons to love him everyday
anyway i've been listening to your link while i was writing that, and i feel like this recording is a fairly good representation of everything that is pure and good in the world. kind of minimalist, but not to an extreme. minimalist music might be the most pretentious type. i cant believe some of the things that are passed off as art or music. this is great though, no, it's perfect actually. If they did any more it would be forced and if they did any less, it would be boring, drones. drowning. feeling. it's so smooth, drawn out electronic lanscape with lazy, light and ugly vocals, the only thing that is alive is the drums and scanting sound effects. but just because something is dead does not mean it's not worth listening to.Noise Song For Tuesday #119?I'm too lazy to read all that.Noise Song For Tuesday #119?yepNoise Song For Tuesday #119?I don't particularly like typing long answers, so I'll keep it short.
I liked it, it was really quite soothing. I like the minimalist kind of approach to music but I don't see myself listening to it very often.
The song was very different...... kind of reminded me of outer space. Overall it was very good and I don't really have any gripes, except for me not digging minimalist music very much.
Thanks for the song... I listen to all the songs you put up, even if I don't give a reaction.Noise Song For Tuesday #119?uneasy, unnerving drones, monotonous and cold. I can't really say that they're doing anything new or exciting with the genre, but it's hard to do anything new with it to be honest...I was kind of dissappointed that it seemed to be nervously building to something that never really came. Then again that might be the point. It just keeps coming in waves, never crashing against anything... no beachheads, no ships.
What they do is pretty good though.
I've listened to a bit of their album, The Door before. Lyrics and vocals on a lot of the stuff there that really don't add much to the music. I;m not sure which way I prefer it.Noise Song For Tuesday #119?The songs you post always make so much more sense if I read through your ramblings while listening. Is that on purpose? Anyway... I'm not wild about this one, but I quite liked it.
:)
To anyone.
Now, I assume, I am on a boat. While on this boat I attain a feeling of hopelessness. I just want to assume ambiguity. No topical drivel. No specifics. No topics. Just %26quot;listening%26quot;. I am in the future, sailing past all those who died and die. I am inside a radio, blaring out for you to hear or shut off. I do not care which as long as it is heard at some point for some time. The sun does not beat down, it just stays suspended by its string. I am still a radio. Change the station. I am a television. Change the channel, go ahead. But, every channel will be the same thing: a surreal bombardment of pretention. I am in the icy water, I feel no cold or bitterness. I feel at ease, to be honest. I am swept away by the waves upon a... I am a clock. Or am I? I am not sure. I cannot make important decisions. I am young and I do not know anything. Now, after a vast amount of time in the pool, I need a scarf. Maybe more than one. Sleep may approach. I don't care, I am not excited for anything. The monotony is now beginning to weigh down on me, so I light a candle and hold it up. So what? No buzzing. No fuzz. No harsh crashes. No sudden thrills. I have a uniform now. I do not know why. Apparently I do not know anything. We are in a field, just in the grass. The cameras are rolling, filming this group of people. They act as though they are concerned, but they aren't. It was in the notes, notes, notes, notes. The script. They can actually show no emotion of their own, just other's. Is it possessive? Direction of where to go, what to do, how to do it and why. Why? That is a question we all have been asked before. Is it brilliant? I couldn't care less whether it is or not. I am tired of judging brilliance and merit and such. The rewards. We do not have goals. Charisma could be one. Apathy. We could just relax on the balcony and look at the trees. We could take part in meaningless interviews, day after day. Just sit in a chair while someone asks you pontless questions. They all want money. Need it. We all do. I don't deserve any. I do not deserve any praise or recognition. I don't deserve anything. You all do, but I do not. Take what you want. How are you, the interviewer wants to know. Are you well? What do you think? I thought you were older, so now my thoughts of you will change. I don't deserve anything. I may....
http://www.last.fm/music/Religious+Knive
So...?
*excuse any mispellings, errors, this, that, these, those, whatever.Noise Song For Tuesday #119?we were talking about how i didnt know any modern free jazz musicians yesterday, well on jeff mangum's radio show he mentioned this bassist, peter kowald, and said he saw him with the peter bauer quartet and it was the best live show he ever attended, then he played a recording -amazing-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aluSEsE76
that wasnt it, but that's the first youtube video that came up for peter kowald
jeff mangum gives me new reasons to love him everyday
anyway i've been listening to your link while i was writing that, and i feel like this recording is a fairly good representation of everything that is pure and good in the world. kind of minimalist, but not to an extreme. minimalist music might be the most pretentious type. i cant believe some of the things that are passed off as art or music. this is great though, no, it's perfect actually. If they did any more it would be forced and if they did any less, it would be boring, drones. drowning. feeling. it's so smooth, drawn out electronic lanscape with lazy, light and ugly vocals, the only thing that is alive is the drums and scanting sound effects. but just because something is dead does not mean it's not worth listening to.Noise Song For Tuesday #119?I'm too lazy to read all that.Noise Song For Tuesday #119?yepNoise Song For Tuesday #119?I don't particularly like typing long answers, so I'll keep it short.
I liked it, it was really quite soothing. I like the minimalist kind of approach to music but I don't see myself listening to it very often.
The song was very different...... kind of reminded me of outer space. Overall it was very good and I don't really have any gripes, except for me not digging minimalist music very much.
Thanks for the song... I listen to all the songs you put up, even if I don't give a reaction.Noise Song For Tuesday #119?uneasy, unnerving drones, monotonous and cold. I can't really say that they're doing anything new or exciting with the genre, but it's hard to do anything new with it to be honest...I was kind of dissappointed that it seemed to be nervously building to something that never really came. Then again that might be the point. It just keeps coming in waves, never crashing against anything... no beachheads, no ships.
What they do is pretty good though.
I've listened to a bit of their album, The Door before. Lyrics and vocals on a lot of the stuff there that really don't add much to the music. I;m not sure which way I prefer it.Noise Song For Tuesday #119?The songs you post always make so much more sense if I read through your ramblings while listening. Is that on purpose? Anyway... I'm not wild about this one, but I quite liked it.
:)
Complete summer makeover?
hey guys! so heres the deal, this summer i want change, like, intense change.
I really want to go back to school looking amazing.
If you have any ideas about what to do and hints or whatever you want,
please help! be mean. ok, so heres a little description of me: im 5%26quot;4 and I weigh 115 pounds,
Most of my height is in my legs. I have blonde hair that gets natural highlights.
in the summer it gets really light. My hair reaches a little past my shoulders.
I have a bit of an acne problem, Im prone to oily skin, so i have mild acne on my face,
and, ok so i know this is gross, but i also have quite a bit of acne on my shoulders,
thats like, my biggest insecurity, so if anyone knows how to get rid of it, I love you.
I really want a super pretty tan, like, a summer glow, but i think i can manage that at the pool and stuff..
My face is oval, but i have very distinct features, a distinct jaw line and huge eyes.
since my hair is blonde, ive been cursed with blonde eyebrows, which kinda sucks,
anyways, theyre about 2 shades darker than my hair, do you think its good to get them shaped or leave them?
I have paleish skin, but it tans pretty quickly.
I have an hourglass shape, with HUGE boobs, curvy hips and a pretty skinny stomach.
the thing that most bothers me are my thighs. I know theyre not big, its just my calfs are soooo thin,
it makes them look really big. so, further information, my measurements, in the order of chest, waist hips in inches is:
35, 26, 34.5. I'm pretty ok with my weight and stuff, mostly i just want to be noticed.
I'm happy with my personality, its not like I want to be popular,
i just love change and this is something ive always wanted. I dont want to be a slut or look like one,
I just want to be one of the pretty girls at school.
I'd also like some tips on what clothes I should wear to get noticed.
Also, any makeup recommendations?
I think thats about it...
oh! and how do you feel about sun in? i think id like to try it...
sorry if this is really scattered and weird, but I really need help!Complete summer makeover?Sun In is great! I would recommend using Sun In if you want lighter golden Blonde hair with highlights. The sun's rays will get rid of the acne on your shoulders, so you wont need to worry about that when heading back to school.
I would also recommend going to a hair salon near the end of summer and getting a really good haircut. I usually avoid paying more than $20 for a haircut, but if you want to get a makeover, that's the best way to change your look! I would recommend getting cute side bangs and layers to make your hair more voluminous. Also, if you can afford it, ask your stylist to add some ash blonde highlights to your hair. they will look great with the Golden blonde. I remember all the girl I thought were pretty in high school had blonde hair with ash blonde highlights.
Seeing as you didn't say what grade you're going into, I'm hesitant to suggest a lot of make-up. If you're self conscious about the acne on your face, you should wear cover up. I recommend Revlon's Photo Ready foundation. It's like $17.00 and it's the best makeup I've ever used. Just make sure you have someone help you find your right color. you'll need a powder that you can keep in your purse that you can apply when your skin gets too oily at school. L'oreal makes great powder. I always get the L'oreal True Match powder foundation.
Blush is important too! If you're wearing cover-up, you need to wear blush. If you're old enough for it, black mascara is good too. Don't go too heavy on the lower lashes though. Eye shadows are fun, but bright colors can look flashy and trashy. If you're going to get eye-shadows, avoid green or blue. Instead, look for neutral colors like browns, light pinks and grays.
and yes! definitely get your eye brows shaped! you can buy eye brow pencils and shadows at any store where they sell makeup. You can get one a few shades darker than your eyebrows and apply lightly. If the sun bleaches your hair, it also bleaches your eyebrows. When choosing your color, you should talk to someone that works in the cosmetics department.
As for clothes, skinny jeans are cute, and so are solid colored flats. I like shirts with cardigans over top. American Eagle and Forever 21 have really cute cardigans that you can order online
I hoped this helped!Complete summer makeover?oh my gosh! thank you soooo much! you've helped me so much! i cant wait to get started %26lt;3
as for your back and skin, i would make an appointment with a dermatologist.
don't go too big on makeup. i always think people look way better with less makeup than they do with more.
hope this helps a little! good luckComplete summer makeover?Okay, so to get rid of the shoulder acne, try using the white, creamy Clearasil. I personally adore sundresses, so if that shoulder acne clears up, wearing sundresses would be adorable, and curling your hair would be sweet. If you're going to go for that look keep your hair from hanging on your face. You could wear flip flops with this look, and if you have gross, scratchy feet, rub them with olive oil and sea salt. It will get rid of the dead skin cells. For the makeup for this look, wear a light eyeliner (jade, yellow, or pink) and mascara.
If you're looking for a sporty look, wear tank tops, and shorts. Pull your hair up and wear one of those elastic head bands. To look a little girly, just wear mascara, and a little lip gloss.
For a girly look, wear tight jeans, and fake nails, wear a bump-it in your hair or something, and straighten it. Wear bolder colors of make-up, but don't make yourself look like a prostitude.
Don't wear neon clothes, you'll just blend in, and they don't compliment anyone. They're ugly in my opinion.
I really want to go back to school looking amazing.
If you have any ideas about what to do and hints or whatever you want,
please help! be mean. ok, so heres a little description of me: im 5%26quot;4 and I weigh 115 pounds,
Most of my height is in my legs. I have blonde hair that gets natural highlights.
in the summer it gets really light. My hair reaches a little past my shoulders.
I have a bit of an acne problem, Im prone to oily skin, so i have mild acne on my face,
and, ok so i know this is gross, but i also have quite a bit of acne on my shoulders,
thats like, my biggest insecurity, so if anyone knows how to get rid of it, I love you.
I really want a super pretty tan, like, a summer glow, but i think i can manage that at the pool and stuff..
My face is oval, but i have very distinct features, a distinct jaw line and huge eyes.
since my hair is blonde, ive been cursed with blonde eyebrows, which kinda sucks,
anyways, theyre about 2 shades darker than my hair, do you think its good to get them shaped or leave them?
I have paleish skin, but it tans pretty quickly.
I have an hourglass shape, with HUGE boobs, curvy hips and a pretty skinny stomach.
the thing that most bothers me are my thighs. I know theyre not big, its just my calfs are soooo thin,
it makes them look really big. so, further information, my measurements, in the order of chest, waist hips in inches is:
35, 26, 34.5. I'm pretty ok with my weight and stuff, mostly i just want to be noticed.
I'm happy with my personality, its not like I want to be popular,
i just love change and this is something ive always wanted. I dont want to be a slut or look like one,
I just want to be one of the pretty girls at school.
I'd also like some tips on what clothes I should wear to get noticed.
Also, any makeup recommendations?
I think thats about it...
oh! and how do you feel about sun in? i think id like to try it...
sorry if this is really scattered and weird, but I really need help!Complete summer makeover?Sun In is great! I would recommend using Sun In if you want lighter golden Blonde hair with highlights. The sun's rays will get rid of the acne on your shoulders, so you wont need to worry about that when heading back to school.
I would also recommend going to a hair salon near the end of summer and getting a really good haircut. I usually avoid paying more than $20 for a haircut, but if you want to get a makeover, that's the best way to change your look! I would recommend getting cute side bangs and layers to make your hair more voluminous. Also, if you can afford it, ask your stylist to add some ash blonde highlights to your hair. they will look great with the Golden blonde. I remember all the girl I thought were pretty in high school had blonde hair with ash blonde highlights.
Seeing as you didn't say what grade you're going into, I'm hesitant to suggest a lot of make-up. If you're self conscious about the acne on your face, you should wear cover up. I recommend Revlon's Photo Ready foundation. It's like $17.00 and it's the best makeup I've ever used. Just make sure you have someone help you find your right color. you'll need a powder that you can keep in your purse that you can apply when your skin gets too oily at school. L'oreal makes great powder. I always get the L'oreal True Match powder foundation.
Blush is important too! If you're wearing cover-up, you need to wear blush. If you're old enough for it, black mascara is good too. Don't go too heavy on the lower lashes though. Eye shadows are fun, but bright colors can look flashy and trashy. If you're going to get eye-shadows, avoid green or blue. Instead, look for neutral colors like browns, light pinks and grays.
and yes! definitely get your eye brows shaped! you can buy eye brow pencils and shadows at any store where they sell makeup. You can get one a few shades darker than your eyebrows and apply lightly. If the sun bleaches your hair, it also bleaches your eyebrows. When choosing your color, you should talk to someone that works in the cosmetics department.
As for clothes, skinny jeans are cute, and so are solid colored flats. I like shirts with cardigans over top. American Eagle and Forever 21 have really cute cardigans that you can order online
I hoped this helped!Complete summer makeover?oh my gosh! thank you soooo much! you've helped me so much! i cant wait to get started %26lt;3
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Complete summer makeover?i've tried sun in, but i don't like blonde hair on me(: it works though! i would definitely try it! but don't use it unless you want it to stay blonde, cause if you stop going out in the sun or something your roots will grow out.as for your back and skin, i would make an appointment with a dermatologist.
don't go too big on makeup. i always think people look way better with less makeup than they do with more.
hope this helps a little! good luckComplete summer makeover?Okay, so to get rid of the shoulder acne, try using the white, creamy Clearasil. I personally adore sundresses, so if that shoulder acne clears up, wearing sundresses would be adorable, and curling your hair would be sweet. If you're going to go for that look keep your hair from hanging on your face. You could wear flip flops with this look, and if you have gross, scratchy feet, rub them with olive oil and sea salt. It will get rid of the dead skin cells. For the makeup for this look, wear a light eyeliner (jade, yellow, or pink) and mascara.
If you're looking for a sporty look, wear tank tops, and shorts. Pull your hair up and wear one of those elastic head bands. To look a little girly, just wear mascara, and a little lip gloss.
For a girly look, wear tight jeans, and fake nails, wear a bump-it in your hair or something, and straighten it. Wear bolder colors of make-up, but don't make yourself look like a prostitude.
Don't wear neon clothes, you'll just blend in, and they don't compliment anyone. They're ugly in my opinion.
What do you think of this?
I Feel Anger For The Evil Angel
I am not a person who likes to wander through a crowded street and try to sort out all the problems in my head, and neither am I one to tell them to someone else and talk it all out. So when this anger came upon me, I retreated to the forest instead.
How do I justify this anger? Is it because I am hurt? Because I feel shame? Maybe it stems from love I cannot help but feel, and desire I cannot hold back. I can tell you what brought this anger, but am lost as to exactly why, which leaves me in complete and utter turmoil.
You see this man, Angel Oreagumo, has yet again inserted his piece into the puzzle called my life. He has already done this seven times. Seven times he has made me love him, and seven times he has betrayed me.
I have worked hard to pick up my life. How dare he now, when I am finally happy, invade that life? He thinks he's indestructible, maybe I should prove him wrong. I could shoot him, stab him, maybe slice his face open. Or maybe I should just get straight to the point and cut off his d**k....
I stand up and begin to stalk through the tree's, unable to stay still, seeking violence. As I stalk forward for some reason I feel like something is changing. One moment I am alone in the forest, the next I am facing a cement wall. I notice the change, but at the same time I don't register it. I just keep following my feelings of anger.
I imagine the wall as the barrier Oreagumo puts up when he begins to feel close to something. I imagine taking my fists and pounding on it until blood drains down the cement to lay in a pool at my feet.
I give one experimental punch. It scrapes my knuckles a little, but so little that the marks would be gone in a day or two. I hit again with my other hand. Enjoying the pain, wanting any kind of release, I continue. Left, right, left, right, faster and faster.
I feel emotion rising. All of a sudden, out of nowhere every single person that complicates my life is coming at me from all directions. I barely have time to feel any kind of shock, or wonder where they all came from before I see him. Out of the middle comes Oreagumo, his evil black wings extending from his shoulders, showing him for the Evil Angel he is.
He comes at me, his facial expression changing with his voice. In a soft and caring voice, %26quot;I love you, I care about you, I can't live without you.%26quot; Switches to a breathless, cold, and bitter baritone, %26quot;You're great in bed baby. One more f**k before I rip you to pieces. Please baby, just come here.%26quot; Now he smiles at me with a smile so evil it must be worthy of the Devil.
My head is spinning, blood is draining from my hands, down my arms and the rest of my body. It's warmth is almost comforting next to the cold that has just slammed into my heart. I can't move, I can't breathe. I feel like I'm having a heart attack. One minute my heart beats so fast I feel like I'm going to explode, the next it stops altogether.
I can't stand to look into the beautiful face, not when it holds such a horrendous expression. I turn to look away and see that the cement wall has now turned into blood-red flames, flames that reflect my face as I stare into them.
As I look into my own scared eyes, I know I cannot just turn away. I must instead stand and fight, because if I cannot conquer Oreagumo, he will conquer me. And if he conquers me, I know I will slip away from the light and into the black.
I push the panic away to be replaced by a flash of anger. I turn from he blood fire to face the Evil Angel just as he is reaching out to touch me, his immense wings curl in to cage me. My fear gone, all my thoughts are indignant. How dare he! As he leans in to as if to kiss me, or maybe just steal my soul, I let out a scream of pure, violent rage.
He moves faster than I would have thought possible and brings his lips down onto mine and grabs my waist. His wings extend and I realize he is going to launch into the air with me. As we go up, still kissing, panic yet again mingles with anger as I understand I will never be able to conquer him. I needn't have worried about him taking my soul, for I have, without realizing it, already given it to him. I scream angrily into his mouth, and I want to kill him for making me feel this. I can feel my eye's burning behind the lids and my blood begin to boil...
And then I wake up. I'm lying on the forest floor in the pitch black of night, it's raining. In the dark, I imagine the rain to be blood. No longer muffled by the Evil Angels mouth, my screams echo loudly in the forest. I manage to stop the violent screaming, but the anger, the animal urge to kill, it's still there. Oh yes, the anger for the Evil Angel is still there.What do you think of this?I am impressed that you are only 16 and I thought this is really good! I think you are very talented! About the story, I didn't really got it (was that a dream?) but you are good at writing!
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;
Answer mine?
I am not a person who likes to wander through a crowded street and try to sort out all the problems in my head, and neither am I one to tell them to someone else and talk it all out. So when this anger came upon me, I retreated to the forest instead.
How do I justify this anger? Is it because I am hurt? Because I feel shame? Maybe it stems from love I cannot help but feel, and desire I cannot hold back. I can tell you what brought this anger, but am lost as to exactly why, which leaves me in complete and utter turmoil.
You see this man, Angel Oreagumo, has yet again inserted his piece into the puzzle called my life. He has already done this seven times. Seven times he has made me love him, and seven times he has betrayed me.
I have worked hard to pick up my life. How dare he now, when I am finally happy, invade that life? He thinks he's indestructible, maybe I should prove him wrong. I could shoot him, stab him, maybe slice his face open. Or maybe I should just get straight to the point and cut off his d**k....
I stand up and begin to stalk through the tree's, unable to stay still, seeking violence. As I stalk forward for some reason I feel like something is changing. One moment I am alone in the forest, the next I am facing a cement wall. I notice the change, but at the same time I don't register it. I just keep following my feelings of anger.
I imagine the wall as the barrier Oreagumo puts up when he begins to feel close to something. I imagine taking my fists and pounding on it until blood drains down the cement to lay in a pool at my feet.
I give one experimental punch. It scrapes my knuckles a little, but so little that the marks would be gone in a day or two. I hit again with my other hand. Enjoying the pain, wanting any kind of release, I continue. Left, right, left, right, faster and faster.
I feel emotion rising. All of a sudden, out of nowhere every single person that complicates my life is coming at me from all directions. I barely have time to feel any kind of shock, or wonder where they all came from before I see him. Out of the middle comes Oreagumo, his evil black wings extending from his shoulders, showing him for the Evil Angel he is.
He comes at me, his facial expression changing with his voice. In a soft and caring voice, %26quot;I love you, I care about you, I can't live without you.%26quot; Switches to a breathless, cold, and bitter baritone, %26quot;You're great in bed baby. One more f**k before I rip you to pieces. Please baby, just come here.%26quot; Now he smiles at me with a smile so evil it must be worthy of the Devil.
My head is spinning, blood is draining from my hands, down my arms and the rest of my body. It's warmth is almost comforting next to the cold that has just slammed into my heart. I can't move, I can't breathe. I feel like I'm having a heart attack. One minute my heart beats so fast I feel like I'm going to explode, the next it stops altogether.
I can't stand to look into the beautiful face, not when it holds such a horrendous expression. I turn to look away and see that the cement wall has now turned into blood-red flames, flames that reflect my face as I stare into them.
As I look into my own scared eyes, I know I cannot just turn away. I must instead stand and fight, because if I cannot conquer Oreagumo, he will conquer me. And if he conquers me, I know I will slip away from the light and into the black.
I push the panic away to be replaced by a flash of anger. I turn from he blood fire to face the Evil Angel just as he is reaching out to touch me, his immense wings curl in to cage me. My fear gone, all my thoughts are indignant. How dare he! As he leans in to as if to kiss me, or maybe just steal my soul, I let out a scream of pure, violent rage.
He moves faster than I would have thought possible and brings his lips down onto mine and grabs my waist. His wings extend and I realize he is going to launch into the air with me. As we go up, still kissing, panic yet again mingles with anger as I understand I will never be able to conquer him. I needn't have worried about him taking my soul, for I have, without realizing it, already given it to him. I scream angrily into his mouth, and I want to kill him for making me feel this. I can feel my eye's burning behind the lids and my blood begin to boil...
And then I wake up. I'm lying on the forest floor in the pitch black of night, it's raining. In the dark, I imagine the rain to be blood. No longer muffled by the Evil Angels mouth, my screams echo loudly in the forest. I manage to stop the violent screaming, but the anger, the animal urge to kill, it's still there. Oh yes, the anger for the Evil Angel is still there.What do you think of this?I am impressed that you are only 16 and I thought this is really good! I think you are very talented! About the story, I didn't really got it (was that a dream?) but you are good at writing!
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;
Answer mine?
Will this excercise routine make me bulky?
I am a 18 year old girl. i have always been pretty active but now with university i dont do any sports so i have started going to the gym. i go the pool for 40 mins in the morning and gym on the treadmill or eliptical for an hour at night. Im not fat but i want to be thin and lean and not get bulky--- i dont mean weight lifter bulky but ...athlete girl bulky... you know what i mean. Is this routine going to do that? i also do 15 minutes of strectch after each of course and i was thinking about adding in light weights for 10 minutes or so before swimming... would that be okay? let me know what you think and if i should kep this routine or how i can change it to suit my needs
also
my diet is the following:
Breakfast: cereal or toast with an egg and fruit with a glass of milk.
Lunch: some sort of sandwitch (usually peanut butter or turkey)
supper: salade with tofu and light dressing with lots of veggies
I drink three 591 mL water bottles a day
snacks include a muffin and an apple and orange per day
is this too much?
will It make me bulky?
how should i change it if i should?
THANKS!! :)Will this excercise routine make me bulky?No you will not get bulky! you can even lift weights and not get bulky. Most women cannot gain muscle like men can and the women who do either eat alot of food/take many supplements or take drugs.
Your workout seems more geared towards stamina so again bulky is probably the last thing that will happen to you. More like a long a lean look.Will this excercise routine make me bulky?As far as slimming down you definately need to incorporate weight training because it burns the most fat. For best results interval train, for example do 3 sets of 8 with weights then go hit the treadmill for 2-3 minutes then back to the weights and so on. This keeps your metabolism higher than cardio alone.
On your meal plan it looks good, just be sure to eat protein at each meal it makes you feel fuller longer. And if your diet includes carbs be sure to eat the majority of your carbs for breakfast, that way your body can break them down while going threw everyday activities.
Hope this helps.Will this excercise routine make me bulky?perfect.. and no you wont get bulky.. just sexy and prettyacne on back shoulders robin summer rentals
also
my diet is the following:
Breakfast: cereal or toast with an egg and fruit with a glass of milk.
Lunch: some sort of sandwitch (usually peanut butter or turkey)
supper: salade with tofu and light dressing with lots of veggies
I drink three 591 mL water bottles a day
snacks include a muffin and an apple and orange per day
is this too much?
will It make me bulky?
how should i change it if i should?
THANKS!! :)Will this excercise routine make me bulky?No you will not get bulky! you can even lift weights and not get bulky. Most women cannot gain muscle like men can and the women who do either eat alot of food/take many supplements or take drugs.
Your workout seems more geared towards stamina so again bulky is probably the last thing that will happen to you. More like a long a lean look.Will this excercise routine make me bulky?As far as slimming down you definately need to incorporate weight training because it burns the most fat. For best results interval train, for example do 3 sets of 8 with weights then go hit the treadmill for 2-3 minutes then back to the weights and so on. This keeps your metabolism higher than cardio alone.
On your meal plan it looks good, just be sure to eat protein at each meal it makes you feel fuller longer. And if your diet includes carbs be sure to eat the majority of your carbs for breakfast, that way your body can break them down while going threw everyday activities.
Hope this helps.Will this excercise routine make me bulky?perfect.. and no you wont get bulky.. just sexy and pretty
I need to shorten my essay, can anyone help me?
Okay, my essay is 873 words, and it has to be no more then 550. I'm a basketball player writing about a game I had. This essay is a vignette. I need any tips on how to shorten it/cut it down. Thank you, also if you could let me know if there's good descriptive language in it, and what needs improvement.
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At first it seemed like a normal day. Nothing was different from the previous games. As I warmed up with sprints and set shots, I found myself experiencing an overload of electricity sparkling all over my body. All I was thinking about was winning. The battering warm up buzzer sounded and it echoed through my ears that game-time was here. My team and I whizzed jubilantly to the huddle with the coach. Coach told us with a voice of pure inspiration that a win was guaranteed if we played defense and moved the ball around. You could just tell from the look in our eyes, like a rattlesnake ready to pounce, that our energy was ecstatic. I never truly thought about it, but one play, one mistake, can change the status of the game. With some dispute we finally come to a clear conclusion on who would match up with whom. The scoreboard was set, and the court was cleared, the first quarter inching closer and closer to starting as every second passed in my mind. We loose the furiously fought jump ball, and the clock, seemingly taking forever, finally started counting down. Our defense was ruptured into halves like a melted chocolate bar and before anything could be done, they scored with an easy layup. My body moved like it was on springs, surprisingly more accelerated then the previous games. Fortunately for them, my time to score wasn’t until later in the game. They delivered around the ball; finally they put up a blatant shot bonking the rim sounding like a flock of crows. I pounced up with my palm and clinched the ball down over every person nearby. As we scuttle back down court I instantaneously popped my head up and my eyes stuck to the scoreboard like bees on honey. Displayed in gigantic orange numbers, the score was tied at 25. There were 9 seconds left to get off a prayer, and my team-mate threw me a scorching chest pass. I penetrated down court like a flash of light. They tried to swipe the ball, but failed as I left them in the dust. Glancing up I saw there were 3 seconds left, and bolted my feet into a deep 35 foot shot, like I was diving into a swimming pool, only this swimming pool is the basket. As the last second is ripped apart from the clock like a magnet, my arms raised and my eyes set on the target, the ball is released and my wrist flicks down. The shot flies over the court and goes through with fire covering it. My team-mates gave me what seemed like a billion high fives. I then limped myself onto the bench. My body was dead tired so I was a spectator for some of the fourth quarter. To start the fourth quarter, my team-mates rushed the ball up court. A minute passed and my team was exterminated like bugs every time we laid even a finger on the ball. The score was 36-28 them. With 4 minutes left, we took a time-out. Coach quickly drew up a play for us as I got set to return. We had the ball. Down low I cut through, and we swung the ball the other way, with just enough space I slipped through and got an opening and blitzed a 3 pointer with all of my effort, trying to keep us alive. I was in a different zone, nothing would effect me, I was set on winning and nobody could change that. I burned back down court to play defense. They’re guard got a clear lane for a layup, but I angrily refused to give up. I came swooping in from behind and skied over him like a hawk, and rejected the ball so ferociously that it was as if he had no chance. I raced down court with the ball. My defender was too slow to pick me up, so I stepped into a 3 pointer, and before he could get his hand on the ball I released. Some how, I felt it; I knew even before I took the shot, that it was going in. 32 seconds remained, we needed to stop them from scoring. We didn’t let anybody get through, after about 20 seconds; I had a chance to steal. I rifled my arm through for the ball and knocked it away. My team-mate dived for it and in a split second called time out. This was it; the coach came up with a play that just might save the game. 8 seconds on the clock, the 8 seconds that meant win, or loose. We get the ball inbounded after struggling for 4 seconds. I had to think quickly, time was not on my side, 5 seconds, I cut and amazingly I got through a perfectly set screen, 3 seconds now I get the ball, like a rocket ship, I exploded, falling away and gunning it from deep to win the game. Few people will have the chance to understand the feeling; the feeling of knowing every shot you take is going down, the feeling of all your confidence rising from your heart, the feeling of being in the zone.I need to shorten my essay, can anyone help me?I don't mean to sound negative, but this essay has too many irrelevant details, like the constant references to how many seconds everything takes. You need to build more human interest into your story. Also, the whole essay is written as one paragraph. That's an incorrect format.
Get a book on compositional style from the library. You can learn how to write better essays that way. Keep trying!I need to shorten my essay, can anyone help me?tat is realy good but when i went 2 school %26amp; had assingments/essay's i all ways went over the word liment tat was set %26amp; they did not mind so all wat u can do is hand it is as a draft of just let the teacher have a look all over it and if the teacher like it u will or might just have 2 fix up sum things.
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At first it seemed like a normal day. Nothing was different from the previous games. As I warmed up with sprints and set shots, I found myself experiencing an overload of electricity sparkling all over my body. All I was thinking about was winning. The battering warm up buzzer sounded and it echoed through my ears that game-time was here. My team and I whizzed jubilantly to the huddle with the coach. Coach told us with a voice of pure inspiration that a win was guaranteed if we played defense and moved the ball around. You could just tell from the look in our eyes, like a rattlesnake ready to pounce, that our energy was ecstatic. I never truly thought about it, but one play, one mistake, can change the status of the game. With some dispute we finally come to a clear conclusion on who would match up with whom. The scoreboard was set, and the court was cleared, the first quarter inching closer and closer to starting as every second passed in my mind. We loose the furiously fought jump ball, and the clock, seemingly taking forever, finally started counting down. Our defense was ruptured into halves like a melted chocolate bar and before anything could be done, they scored with an easy layup. My body moved like it was on springs, surprisingly more accelerated then the previous games. Fortunately for them, my time to score wasn’t until later in the game. They delivered around the ball; finally they put up a blatant shot bonking the rim sounding like a flock of crows. I pounced up with my palm and clinched the ball down over every person nearby. As we scuttle back down court I instantaneously popped my head up and my eyes stuck to the scoreboard like bees on honey. Displayed in gigantic orange numbers, the score was tied at 25. There were 9 seconds left to get off a prayer, and my team-mate threw me a scorching chest pass. I penetrated down court like a flash of light. They tried to swipe the ball, but failed as I left them in the dust. Glancing up I saw there were 3 seconds left, and bolted my feet into a deep 35 foot shot, like I was diving into a swimming pool, only this swimming pool is the basket. As the last second is ripped apart from the clock like a magnet, my arms raised and my eyes set on the target, the ball is released and my wrist flicks down. The shot flies over the court and goes through with fire covering it. My team-mates gave me what seemed like a billion high fives. I then limped myself onto the bench. My body was dead tired so I was a spectator for some of the fourth quarter. To start the fourth quarter, my team-mates rushed the ball up court. A minute passed and my team was exterminated like bugs every time we laid even a finger on the ball. The score was 36-28 them. With 4 minutes left, we took a time-out. Coach quickly drew up a play for us as I got set to return. We had the ball. Down low I cut through, and we swung the ball the other way, with just enough space I slipped through and got an opening and blitzed a 3 pointer with all of my effort, trying to keep us alive. I was in a different zone, nothing would effect me, I was set on winning and nobody could change that. I burned back down court to play defense. They’re guard got a clear lane for a layup, but I angrily refused to give up. I came swooping in from behind and skied over him like a hawk, and rejected the ball so ferociously that it was as if he had no chance. I raced down court with the ball. My defender was too slow to pick me up, so I stepped into a 3 pointer, and before he could get his hand on the ball I released. Some how, I felt it; I knew even before I took the shot, that it was going in. 32 seconds remained, we needed to stop them from scoring. We didn’t let anybody get through, after about 20 seconds; I had a chance to steal. I rifled my arm through for the ball and knocked it away. My team-mate dived for it and in a split second called time out. This was it; the coach came up with a play that just might save the game. 8 seconds on the clock, the 8 seconds that meant win, or loose. We get the ball inbounded after struggling for 4 seconds. I had to think quickly, time was not on my side, 5 seconds, I cut and amazingly I got through a perfectly set screen, 3 seconds now I get the ball, like a rocket ship, I exploded, falling away and gunning it from deep to win the game. Few people will have the chance to understand the feeling; the feeling of knowing every shot you take is going down, the feeling of all your confidence rising from your heart, the feeling of being in the zone.I need to shorten my essay, can anyone help me?I don't mean to sound negative, but this essay has too many irrelevant details, like the constant references to how many seconds everything takes. You need to build more human interest into your story. Also, the whole essay is written as one paragraph. That's an incorrect format.
Get a book on compositional style from the library. You can learn how to write better essays that way. Keep trying!I need to shorten my essay, can anyone help me?tat is realy good but when i went 2 school %26amp; had assingments/essay's i all ways went over the word liment tat was set %26amp; they did not mind so all wat u can do is hand it is as a draft of just let the teacher have a look all over it and if the teacher like it u will or might just have 2 fix up sum things.
Can anyone look over my English paper?
my paper is on how the students in Toni Cade Bambara's %26quot;the lesson%26quot; are chained just as the prisoners in plato's %26quot;The Allegory of the cave%26quot;
here is the text of the books
plato: http://www.historyguide.org/intellect/al…
Toni Cade Bambara: http://cai.ucdavis.edu/gender/thelesson.…
here is my paper (if anyone knows of any other websites that will look it over it will be great)
The students in “the lesson” are chained by there ignorance, in not wanting to change there lives and knowing how the rich live, just as the Prisoners in “the Allegory of the cave” are physically chained to the ground only being able to see what is in front of them. In the story of “the lesson” the students are taken out of there sense of Comfort, just as the person who gets pulled out of there cave in “the Allegory of the cave.” The students in “the lesson” are reluctant to leave there little area of the world just as the freed person who was once enchained in “the Allegory of the cave.”
In “the lesson” the children did not wish to go on this Field trip with Miss Moore they would “rather go to the pool or to a show were it is cool.” (452) they did not want to go out of there neighborhood, just like a gang member would not want to leave his small pond were he is comfortable and go into a bigger pond were they have no control over what goes on in the area, which is also compared to “the prisoner (who) is released and disabused of their error. (who) at first, when any of them is liberated and compelled suddenly to stand up and ... look towards the light... and dragged up a steep and rugged ascent and held fast until he is forced into the presence of the sun,” (1276) in “the allegory of the cave.” When the students get to were they are going they are amazed by what it is they see, just as the prisoner is amazed by the sight of the light sight of the light. The Students are also frightened by being out of there element being in a rich person's toy store, F.A.O Schwartz. Just as the prisoner would be frightened by the light of the Sun and would not want to go out of his comfort zone, of the cave.
The shadows in “the allegory of the of the cave” are also very significant when comparing the two stories together because in “the lesson” the students are only seeing there shadows of reality while being in there little ghetto of New york city. The students are quick to judge what they see from being outside of the Toy store, such as the “one lady in a fur coat” (453) who by seeing this one person saying “white folks crazy” (453) just as the prisoner would think whatever they saw outside of the cave would look a little crazy to them. Just as if the prisoners were to “look towards the light, he would suffer sharp pains; the glare will distress him, and will be unable to see the realities of which in his former state he had seen the shadows; and then conceive some one saying to him, that what he saw before was an illusion” (1276) which the students, who were satisfied staying in there part of the city were satisfied with there illusion of life.
As the children enter the toy store and find what is outside of there cave and learn that there is more to what is out there such as a sailboat, that cost one hundred and ninety-five dollars, and a microscope, that cost three hundred dollars, just as if the prisoners were now free to see what is outside of there cave.
When the students get back to there part of the city Miss Moore is hoping that the kids have learned what is outside of there part of town. Just as the freed prisoner would go into the cave and tell all the other enslaved prisoners what he has seen in the outside world.Can anyone look over my English paper?Paragraph 4 makes no sense--it is not even a sentence. There are quite a few spelling errors and punctuation errors as well. YOu have several sentence fragments in several paragraphs. Try not starting a sentence with %26quot;just%26quot; for one.Can anyone look over my English paper?In nearly all the places that you used the word %26quot;there%26quot;, you should have used the word %26quot;their%26quot;. There are more problems with this paper, but the one I've mentioned is one of those that's really going to stick in your English teacher's craw.
here is the text of the books
plato: http://www.historyguide.org/intellect/al…
Toni Cade Bambara: http://cai.ucdavis.edu/gender/thelesson.…
here is my paper (if anyone knows of any other websites that will look it over it will be great)
The students in “the lesson” are chained by there ignorance, in not wanting to change there lives and knowing how the rich live, just as the Prisoners in “the Allegory of the cave” are physically chained to the ground only being able to see what is in front of them. In the story of “the lesson” the students are taken out of there sense of Comfort, just as the person who gets pulled out of there cave in “the Allegory of the cave.” The students in “the lesson” are reluctant to leave there little area of the world just as the freed person who was once enchained in “the Allegory of the cave.”
In “the lesson” the children did not wish to go on this Field trip with Miss Moore they would “rather go to the pool or to a show were it is cool.” (452) they did not want to go out of there neighborhood, just like a gang member would not want to leave his small pond were he is comfortable and go into a bigger pond were they have no control over what goes on in the area, which is also compared to “the prisoner (who) is released and disabused of their error. (who) at first, when any of them is liberated and compelled suddenly to stand up and ... look towards the light... and dragged up a steep and rugged ascent and held fast until he is forced into the presence of the sun,” (1276) in “the allegory of the cave.” When the students get to were they are going they are amazed by what it is they see, just as the prisoner is amazed by the sight of the light sight of the light. The Students are also frightened by being out of there element being in a rich person's toy store, F.A.O Schwartz. Just as the prisoner would be frightened by the light of the Sun and would not want to go out of his comfort zone, of the cave.
The shadows in “the allegory of the of the cave” are also very significant when comparing the two stories together because in “the lesson” the students are only seeing there shadows of reality while being in there little ghetto of New york city. The students are quick to judge what they see from being outside of the Toy store, such as the “one lady in a fur coat” (453) who by seeing this one person saying “white folks crazy” (453) just as the prisoner would think whatever they saw outside of the cave would look a little crazy to them. Just as if the prisoners were to “look towards the light, he would suffer sharp pains; the glare will distress him, and will be unable to see the realities of which in his former state he had seen the shadows; and then conceive some one saying to him, that what he saw before was an illusion” (1276) which the students, who were satisfied staying in there part of the city were satisfied with there illusion of life.
As the children enter the toy store and find what is outside of there cave and learn that there is more to what is out there such as a sailboat, that cost one hundred and ninety-five dollars, and a microscope, that cost three hundred dollars, just as if the prisoners were now free to see what is outside of there cave.
When the students get back to there part of the city Miss Moore is hoping that the kids have learned what is outside of there part of town. Just as the freed prisoner would go into the cave and tell all the other enslaved prisoners what he has seen in the outside world.Can anyone look over my English paper?Paragraph 4 makes no sense--it is not even a sentence. There are quite a few spelling errors and punctuation errors as well. YOu have several sentence fragments in several paragraphs. Try not starting a sentence with %26quot;just%26quot; for one.Can anyone look over my English paper?In nearly all the places that you used the word %26quot;there%26quot;, you should have used the word %26quot;their%26quot;. There are more problems with this paper, but the one I've mentioned is one of those that's really going to stick in your English teacher's craw.
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Can anyone look over my English paper?Cave should be capitalized its a bigger word in the title, an important word. There's like 10 more mistakes, you'll have to find them yourself, however.
Anyone willing to look over my paper?
ok I have a paper to wrote on how the students in toni Cade Bambara's %26quot;the Lesson%26quot; (http://cai.ucdavis.edu/gender/thelesson.… are like the Prisoners in plato's %26quot;The Allegory of the cave%26quot; (http://webspace.ship.edu/cgboer/platosca… I got just over a page and need it to be 2-2 1/2 pages long so if anyone has anything to add it will be great. if you which for a file transfer I can do that just email me at frend2go@yahoo.com
here it is (I have separated the paragraphs here to be easily seen)
The students in “the lesson” are chained by there ignorance, in not wanting to change there lives and knowing how the rich live, just as the Prisoners in “the Allegory of the cave” are physically chained to the ground only being able to see what is in front of them. In the story of “the lesson” the students are taken out of there sense of Comfort, just as the person who gets pulled out of there cave in “the Allegory of the cave.” The students in “the lesson” are reluctant to leave there little area of the world just as the freed person who was once enchained in “the Allegory of the cave.”
In “the lesson” the children did not wish to go on this Field trip with Miss Moore they would “rather go to the pool or to a show were it is cool.” (452) they did not want to go out of there neighborhood, just like a gang member would not want to leave his small pond were he is comfortable and go into a bigger pond were they have no control over what goes on in the area, which is also compared to “the prisoner (who) is released and disabused of their error. (who) at first, when any of them is liberated and compelled suddenly to stand up and ... look towards the light... and dragged up a steep and rugged ascent and held fast until he is forced into the presence of the sun,” (1276) in “the allegory of the cave.” When the students get to were they are going they are amazed by what it is they see, just as the prisoner is amazed by the sight of the light sight of the light. The Students are also frightened by being out of there element being in a rich person's toy store, F.A.O Schwartz. Just as the prisoner would be frightened by the light of the Sun and would not want to go out of his comfort zone, of the cave.
The shadows in “the allegory of the of the cave” are also very significant when comparing the two stories together because in “the lesson” the students are only seeing there shadows of reality while being in there little ghetto of New york city. The students are quick to judge what they see from being outside of the Toy store, such as the “one lady in a fur coat” (453) who by seeing this one person saying “white folks crazy” (453) just as the prisoner would think whatever they saw outside of the cave would look a little crazy to them. Just as if the prisoners were to “look towards the light, he would suffer sharp pains; the glare will distress him, and will be unable to see the realities of which in his former state he had seen the shadows; and then conceive some one saying to him, that what he saw before was an illusion” (1276) which the students, who were satisfied staying in there part of the city were satisfied with there illusion of life.
As the children enter the toy store and find what is outside of there cave and learn that there is more to what is out there such as a sailboat, that cost one hundred and ninety-five dollars, and a microscope, that cost three hundred dollars, just as if the prisoners were now free to see what is outside of there cave.
When the students get back to there part of the city Miss Moore is hoping that the kids have learned what is outside of there part of town. Just as the freed prisoner would go into the cave and tell all the other enslaved prisoners what he has seen in the outside world.Anyone willing to look over my paper?First, you consistently misuse %26quot;there%26quot; for %26quot;their%26quot;, and have a lot of run on sentences. I've mailed you a file with corrections. There are A LOT of them.
here it is (I have separated the paragraphs here to be easily seen)
The students in “the lesson” are chained by there ignorance, in not wanting to change there lives and knowing how the rich live, just as the Prisoners in “the Allegory of the cave” are physically chained to the ground only being able to see what is in front of them. In the story of “the lesson” the students are taken out of there sense of Comfort, just as the person who gets pulled out of there cave in “the Allegory of the cave.” The students in “the lesson” are reluctant to leave there little area of the world just as the freed person who was once enchained in “the Allegory of the cave.”
In “the lesson” the children did not wish to go on this Field trip with Miss Moore they would “rather go to the pool or to a show were it is cool.” (452) they did not want to go out of there neighborhood, just like a gang member would not want to leave his small pond were he is comfortable and go into a bigger pond were they have no control over what goes on in the area, which is also compared to “the prisoner (who) is released and disabused of their error. (who) at first, when any of them is liberated and compelled suddenly to stand up and ... look towards the light... and dragged up a steep and rugged ascent and held fast until he is forced into the presence of the sun,” (1276) in “the allegory of the cave.” When the students get to were they are going they are amazed by what it is they see, just as the prisoner is amazed by the sight of the light sight of the light. The Students are also frightened by being out of there element being in a rich person's toy store, F.A.O Schwartz. Just as the prisoner would be frightened by the light of the Sun and would not want to go out of his comfort zone, of the cave.
The shadows in “the allegory of the of the cave” are also very significant when comparing the two stories together because in “the lesson” the students are only seeing there shadows of reality while being in there little ghetto of New york city. The students are quick to judge what they see from being outside of the Toy store, such as the “one lady in a fur coat” (453) who by seeing this one person saying “white folks crazy” (453) just as the prisoner would think whatever they saw outside of the cave would look a little crazy to them. Just as if the prisoners were to “look towards the light, he would suffer sharp pains; the glare will distress him, and will be unable to see the realities of which in his former state he had seen the shadows; and then conceive some one saying to him, that what he saw before was an illusion” (1276) which the students, who were satisfied staying in there part of the city were satisfied with there illusion of life.
As the children enter the toy store and find what is outside of there cave and learn that there is more to what is out there such as a sailboat, that cost one hundred and ninety-five dollars, and a microscope, that cost three hundred dollars, just as if the prisoners were now free to see what is outside of there cave.
When the students get back to there part of the city Miss Moore is hoping that the kids have learned what is outside of there part of town. Just as the freed prisoner would go into the cave and tell all the other enslaved prisoners what he has seen in the outside world.Anyone willing to look over my paper?First, you consistently misuse %26quot;there%26quot; for %26quot;their%26quot;, and have a lot of run on sentences. I've mailed you a file with corrections. There are A LOT of them.
Can anyone look over my English paper?
my paper is on how the students in Toni Cade Bambara's %26quot;the lesson%26quot; are chained just as the prisoners in plato's %26quot;The Allegory of the cave%26quot;
here is the text of the books
plato: http://www.historyguide.org/intellect/al…
Toni Cade Bambara: http://cai.ucdavis.edu/gender/thelesson.…
here is my paper (if anyone knows of any other websites that will look it over it will be great)
The students in “the lesson” are chained by there ignorance, in not wanting to change there lives and knowing how the rich live, just as the Prisoners in “the Allegory of the cave” are physically chained to the ground only being able to see what is in front of them. In the story of “the lesson” the students are taken out of there sense of Comfort, just as the person who gets pulled out of there cave in “the Allegory of the cave.” The students in “the lesson” are reluctant to leave there little area of the world just as the freed person who was once enchained in “the Allegory of the cave.”
In “the lesson” the children did not wish to go on this Field trip with Miss Moore they would “rather go to the pool or to a show were it is cool.” (452) they did not want to go out of there neighborhood, just like a gang member would not want to leave his small pond were he is comfortable and go into a bigger pond were they have no control over what goes on in the area, which is also compared to “the prisoner (who) is released and disabused of their error. (who) at first, when any of them is liberated and compelled suddenly to stand up and ... look towards the light... and dragged up a steep and rugged ascent and held fast until he is forced into the presence of the sun,” (1276) in “the allegory of the cave.” When the students get to were they are going they are amazed by what it is they see, just as the prisoner is amazed by the sight of the light sight of the light. The Students are also frightened by being out of there element being in a rich person's toy store, F.A.O Schwartz. Just as the prisoner would be frightened by the light of the Sun and would not want to go out of his comfort zone, of the cave.
The shadows in “the allegory of the of the cave” are also very significant when comparing the two stories together because in “the lesson” the students are only seeing there shadows of reality while being in there little ghetto of New york city. The students are quick to judge what they see from being outside of the Toy store, such as the “one lady in a fur coat” (453) who by seeing this one person saying “white folks crazy” (453) just as the prisoner would think whatever they saw outside of the cave would look a little crazy to them. Just as if the prisoners were to “look towards the light, he would suffer sharp pains; the glare will distress him, and will be unable to see the realities of which in his former state he had seen the shadows; and then conceive some one saying to him, that what he saw before was an illusion” (1276) which the students, who were satisfied staying in there part of the city were satisfied with there illusion of life.
As the children enter the toy store and find what is outside of there cave and learn that there is more to what is out there such as a sailboat, that cost one hundred and ninety-five dollars, and a microscope, that cost three hundred dollars, just as if the prisoners were now free to see what is outside of there cave.
When the students get back to there part of the city Miss Moore is hoping that the kids have learned what is outside of there part of town. Just as the freed prisoner would go into the cave and tell all the other enslaved prisoners what he has seen in the outside world.Can anyone look over my English paper?I HATE MLA CITATION. I GOT A ZERO ON MY REPORT JUST BECAUSE I FORGOT A PERIOD IN THE CITATION! URGHHFASKLGVBNSALJKNA
here is the text of the books
plato: http://www.historyguide.org/intellect/al…
Toni Cade Bambara: http://cai.ucdavis.edu/gender/thelesson.…
here is my paper (if anyone knows of any other websites that will look it over it will be great)
The students in “the lesson” are chained by there ignorance, in not wanting to change there lives and knowing how the rich live, just as the Prisoners in “the Allegory of the cave” are physically chained to the ground only being able to see what is in front of them. In the story of “the lesson” the students are taken out of there sense of Comfort, just as the person who gets pulled out of there cave in “the Allegory of the cave.” The students in “the lesson” are reluctant to leave there little area of the world just as the freed person who was once enchained in “the Allegory of the cave.”
In “the lesson” the children did not wish to go on this Field trip with Miss Moore they would “rather go to the pool or to a show were it is cool.” (452) they did not want to go out of there neighborhood, just like a gang member would not want to leave his small pond were he is comfortable and go into a bigger pond were they have no control over what goes on in the area, which is also compared to “the prisoner (who) is released and disabused of their error. (who) at first, when any of them is liberated and compelled suddenly to stand up and ... look towards the light... and dragged up a steep and rugged ascent and held fast until he is forced into the presence of the sun,” (1276) in “the allegory of the cave.” When the students get to were they are going they are amazed by what it is they see, just as the prisoner is amazed by the sight of the light sight of the light. The Students are also frightened by being out of there element being in a rich person's toy store, F.A.O Schwartz. Just as the prisoner would be frightened by the light of the Sun and would not want to go out of his comfort zone, of the cave.
The shadows in “the allegory of the of the cave” are also very significant when comparing the two stories together because in “the lesson” the students are only seeing there shadows of reality while being in there little ghetto of New york city. The students are quick to judge what they see from being outside of the Toy store, such as the “one lady in a fur coat” (453) who by seeing this one person saying “white folks crazy” (453) just as the prisoner would think whatever they saw outside of the cave would look a little crazy to them. Just as if the prisoners were to “look towards the light, he would suffer sharp pains; the glare will distress him, and will be unable to see the realities of which in his former state he had seen the shadows; and then conceive some one saying to him, that what he saw before was an illusion” (1276) which the students, who were satisfied staying in there part of the city were satisfied with there illusion of life.
As the children enter the toy store and find what is outside of there cave and learn that there is more to what is out there such as a sailboat, that cost one hundred and ninety-five dollars, and a microscope, that cost three hundred dollars, just as if the prisoners were now free to see what is outside of there cave.
When the students get back to there part of the city Miss Moore is hoping that the kids have learned what is outside of there part of town. Just as the freed prisoner would go into the cave and tell all the other enslaved prisoners what he has seen in the outside world.Can anyone look over my English paper?I HATE MLA CITATION. I GOT A ZERO ON MY REPORT JUST BECAUSE I FORGOT A PERIOD IN THE CITATION! URGHHFASKLGVBNSALJKNA
Help with Physics homework! (high school AP)?
A beverage glass is filled to the brim with ice-cold water (0潞C) and ice cubes. Some of the ice cubes are floating above the water level. When the ice melts, the water in the glass will
A. spill over the brim.
B. stay at the same level.
C. be less full that before the ice melted.
D. no way to tell the level.
Which undergoes the greater change in momentum, a golf ball or the head of the golf club when the ball is hit from a golf tee?
A. The ball undergoes the greater change.
B. the head of the golf club undergoes a greater change.
C. Both undergo the same change but in opposite directions.
D. The answer depends on how fast the club is moved.
From a bridge, a ball is thrown straight up at the same time a ball is thrown straight down with the same initial speed. Neglecting air resistance, which ball would have a greater speed when it hits the ground?
A. the ball thrown straight up
B. the ball thrown straight down
C. both balls would have the same speed
D. not enough information to answer
Increasing the rate of heating under a pot of boiling water will
A. increase the temperature of the boiling water.
B. increase the rate of boiling, but not the temperature.
C. increase both the rate of boiling and the temperature of the boiling water.
D. all of the above.
The water in a swimming pool is cooler than the surrounding sidewalk because
A. it has a higher specific heat.
B. it has weaker attractive forces.
C. it loses heat more rapidly
D. it has a lower density.
Melting one gram of ice at 0潞C requires 80.0 calories of energy. To what approximate height would this same amount of energy lift a 1.0 kg block of wood?
A. 34 m
B. 8.2 m
C. 3.4 m
D. 3.4 m
All isolated systems will spontaneously tend toward disorder. This phenomenon is referred to as
A. thermal inefficiency.
B. heat transfer.
C. entropy.
D. thermal conductivity.
Suppose ammonia is spilled in the back of a large room. If there were no air currents, how would the temperature influence how fast you would smell ammonia at the opposite side of the room?
A. Warmer air would cause you to smell the ammonia faster.
B. Cooler air would cause you to smell the ammonia faster.
C. There would be no fumes to smell.
D. The temperature does not affect the timing of when you would smell the ammonia.
Does the Doppler effect occur when the observer is moving and the source of sound is stationary?
A. Yes, the effect is the same.
B. No, the source must be moving.
C. Yes, but the change of pitch effects is reversed in this case.
D. No sound is heard by the observer.
During a track and field meet, the time difference between seeing the smoke from a starter's gun and hearing the bang would be less
A. on a warmer day.
B. on a cooler day.
C. if a more powerful shell is used.
D. if a less powerful shell is used.
The magnetism of a piece of magnetized iron can be weakened by
A. heating it.
B. striking it.
C. dropping it.
D. all of the above.
When a wire is moving parallel to a magnetic field,
A. no current is induced in the wire.
B. maximum current is induced in the wire.
C. the same current is induced as if it were perpendicular to the field.
D. an alternating current is induced.
In which type of circuit would you expect a reduction of the available voltage as more and more resistances are added to the circuit?
A. series circuit.
B. parallel circuit.
C. open circuit.
D. none of the above is correct.
When compared to a ? charge, there are
A. an equal number of field lines pointing inward toward a +4 charge.
B. twice as many field lines pointing inward toward a +4 charge.
C. twice as many field lines pointing outward from a +4 charge.
D. half as many field lines pointing outward from a +4 charge.
Which of the following cannot be explained with a wave theory of light?
A. polarization
B. interference
C. photoelectric effect
D. all of the above
If you are standing in the path of a source of light that is moving toward you, the light you see will look _____ than it would ordinarily.
A. redder
B. bluer
C. brighter
D. darker
The sky appears to be blue when the sun is high in the sky because
A. blue is the color of air, water, and other fluids in large amounts.
B. red light is scattered more than blue.
C. blue light is scattered more than the other colors.
D. none of the above is correct.
Light interacts with matter by which process?
A. absorption
B. reflection
C. transmission
D. all of the above are correct
Transverse mechanical waves can pass through
A. solids.
B. liquids.
C. gases.
D. all of the above.
An airplane pilot hears a slow beat from the two engines of his plane. He increases the speed of the right engine and now hears a slower beat. What should the pilot now do to eliminate the beat?
A. Increase the speed in the left engine
B. decrease the speed of the right engine
C. increase the speed of botHelp with Physics homework! (high school AP)?There's this thing called a textbook...Help with Physics homework! (high school AP)?do you own hw!! rodents
A. spill over the brim.
B. stay at the same level.
C. be less full that before the ice melted.
D. no way to tell the level.
Which undergoes the greater change in momentum, a golf ball or the head of the golf club when the ball is hit from a golf tee?
A. The ball undergoes the greater change.
B. the head of the golf club undergoes a greater change.
C. Both undergo the same change but in opposite directions.
D. The answer depends on how fast the club is moved.
From a bridge, a ball is thrown straight up at the same time a ball is thrown straight down with the same initial speed. Neglecting air resistance, which ball would have a greater speed when it hits the ground?
A. the ball thrown straight up
B. the ball thrown straight down
C. both balls would have the same speed
D. not enough information to answer
Increasing the rate of heating under a pot of boiling water will
A. increase the temperature of the boiling water.
B. increase the rate of boiling, but not the temperature.
C. increase both the rate of boiling and the temperature of the boiling water.
D. all of the above.
The water in a swimming pool is cooler than the surrounding sidewalk because
A. it has a higher specific heat.
B. it has weaker attractive forces.
C. it loses heat more rapidly
D. it has a lower density.
Melting one gram of ice at 0潞C requires 80.0 calories of energy. To what approximate height would this same amount of energy lift a 1.0 kg block of wood?
A. 34 m
B. 8.2 m
C. 3.4 m
D. 3.4 m
All isolated systems will spontaneously tend toward disorder. This phenomenon is referred to as
A. thermal inefficiency.
B. heat transfer.
C. entropy.
D. thermal conductivity.
Suppose ammonia is spilled in the back of a large room. If there were no air currents, how would the temperature influence how fast you would smell ammonia at the opposite side of the room?
A. Warmer air would cause you to smell the ammonia faster.
B. Cooler air would cause you to smell the ammonia faster.
C. There would be no fumes to smell.
D. The temperature does not affect the timing of when you would smell the ammonia.
Does the Doppler effect occur when the observer is moving and the source of sound is stationary?
A. Yes, the effect is the same.
B. No, the source must be moving.
C. Yes, but the change of pitch effects is reversed in this case.
D. No sound is heard by the observer.
During a track and field meet, the time difference between seeing the smoke from a starter's gun and hearing the bang would be less
A. on a warmer day.
B. on a cooler day.
C. if a more powerful shell is used.
D. if a less powerful shell is used.
The magnetism of a piece of magnetized iron can be weakened by
A. heating it.
B. striking it.
C. dropping it.
D. all of the above.
When a wire is moving parallel to a magnetic field,
A. no current is induced in the wire.
B. maximum current is induced in the wire.
C. the same current is induced as if it were perpendicular to the field.
D. an alternating current is induced.
In which type of circuit would you expect a reduction of the available voltage as more and more resistances are added to the circuit?
A. series circuit.
B. parallel circuit.
C. open circuit.
D. none of the above is correct.
When compared to a ? charge, there are
A. an equal number of field lines pointing inward toward a +4 charge.
B. twice as many field lines pointing inward toward a +4 charge.
C. twice as many field lines pointing outward from a +4 charge.
D. half as many field lines pointing outward from a +4 charge.
Which of the following cannot be explained with a wave theory of light?
A. polarization
B. interference
C. photoelectric effect
D. all of the above
If you are standing in the path of a source of light that is moving toward you, the light you see will look _____ than it would ordinarily.
A. redder
B. bluer
C. brighter
D. darker
The sky appears to be blue when the sun is high in the sky because
A. blue is the color of air, water, and other fluids in large amounts.
B. red light is scattered more than blue.
C. blue light is scattered more than the other colors.
D. none of the above is correct.
Light interacts with matter by which process?
A. absorption
B. reflection
C. transmission
D. all of the above are correct
Transverse mechanical waves can pass through
A. solids.
B. liquids.
C. gases.
D. all of the above.
An airplane pilot hears a slow beat from the two engines of his plane. He increases the speed of the right engine and now hears a slower beat. What should the pilot now do to eliminate the beat?
A. Increase the speed in the left engine
B. decrease the speed of the right engine
C. increase the speed of botHelp with Physics homework! (high school AP)?There's this thing called a textbook...Help with Physics homework! (high school AP)?do you own hw!!
Sweet Sixteen Need Help?
I'm having a black and white themed 16th birthday party.
Invites? How do i word to dress in black and/or white dresses for girls and just like shorts and button ups for even t-shirts for guys? My birthdays in August and the party is going to be outside so i don't
want people to over heat. There is a pool so i'm going to tell people to bring bathing suits. Which they can wear under there clothing or change into later in the night.
Also should i mail the invites to their homes or e-mail them?
Decor- Once again it's going to be outside on my deck. (By our pool)
There are two deck tables available (0ne round, one Square and both with green umbrella's in the center). A small cafe style table and a two seat bar. There are also two folding tables available for food.I kinda of want to incorporate daisy's into the decor and for the pool black and white inner tubes. But the rest of the decoration i'm unsure about. We have ton's of Christmas lights.
Food- light finger foods
Any other ideas/tips welcome. Please comment. If you'd loike moire detail just ask. Thanks!Sweet Sixteen Need Help?mail them to there home better chance they'll get them and do the invatations in black and white and say you'll need to bring bathing clothes clothe prepare to get wet and have dres:code black and white only please if you get me
http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AgSvcGrBhT29LrK9hXl1bkUgBgx.;_ylv=3?qid=20090730070332AAQczfQ
anser mine please
Invites? How do i word to dress in black and/or white dresses for girls and just like shorts and button ups for even t-shirts for guys? My birthdays in August and the party is going to be outside so i don't
want people to over heat. There is a pool so i'm going to tell people to bring bathing suits. Which they can wear under there clothing or change into later in the night.
Also should i mail the invites to their homes or e-mail them?
Decor- Once again it's going to be outside on my deck. (By our pool)
There are two deck tables available (0ne round, one Square and both with green umbrella's in the center). A small cafe style table and a two seat bar. There are also two folding tables available for food.I kinda of want to incorporate daisy's into the decor and for the pool black and white inner tubes. But the rest of the decoration i'm unsure about. We have ton's of Christmas lights.
Food- light finger foods
Any other ideas/tips welcome. Please comment. If you'd loike moire detail just ask. Thanks!Sweet Sixteen Need Help?mail them to there home better chance they'll get them and do the invatations in black and white and say you'll need to bring bathing clothes clothe prepare to get wet and have dres:code black and white only please if you get me
http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AgSvcGrBhT29LrK9hXl1bkUgBgx.;_ylv=3?qid=20090730070332AAQczfQ
anser mine please
Try to solve these challenging problems! Bet you cant!?
1. A swimmer can swim in still water at a speed of 9.50 m/s. She intends to swim directly across a 15.0 m wide river that has a current of 3.75 m/s.
a) what must her heading be?
b) what is her velocity relative to the bank of the river?
c) how long does it take her to cross the river?
2. What force must be exerted on an electron (mass=9.11x10^-31 kg) to move it from a state of rest to a speed of 3.5 x 10^7 m/s in a distance of 0.75 m?
3. Two satellites of equal mass are orbiting the Earth 75.0 m apart. If the gravitational force between them is 1.50 x 10^-7 N, find the mass of each.
4. A 15,000 N vehicle is parked on an incline that makes an angle of 15.0 degrees with the horizontal. If the maximum for the vehicle's brakes can withstand is 10,000 N, will the vehicle remain at rest?
5. A traffic light is supported by two wires positioned 110 degrees apart. If the maximum tension in each wire is 750 N, what is the maximum weight of the light they can support?
6. A 100-kg commuter is standing on a train accelerating at 3.70 m/s^2. What coefficient of friction must exist between the commuter's feet and the train's floor to avoid sliding?
7. A 65.0 kg crate is to be accelerated at 7.00m/s^2 up an incline making a 25.0 degree angle with the horizontal. If the coefficient of friction between the crate and the incline is 0.200, how much force is required?
8. A 400.0 N child and a 300.0 N child sit on either end of a 2.00 m long seesaw. Where along the seesaw should the pivot be placed to ensure rotational equilibrium?
9. A 250.0 N child and a 200.0 N child are attempting to lift a 500.0 N box sitting 1.00 m from the pivot of their 3.00 m long lever. If the lighter child stands on the end of the lever, where does the heavier child have to stand to balance the lever and lift the box?
10. A looping roller coaster ride at an amusement park has a radius of curvature of 7.50 m. At what minimum speed must the coaster be traveling at the top of the curve so the passengers will not fall out?
11. A 25.0 kg child moves with a speed of 1.93 m/s when sitting 12.5 m from the center of a merry-go-round. Calcuate: a) the centripetal acceleration and b) the centripetal force.
12. A merry go round has a mass of 500.0 kg and radius of 2.00m What tangential force must be applied to change its speed from 0.00 to 2.5 rad/s in 5.0 s? The frictional force is 75.0 N.
13. A spinning bicycle wheel 65.0 cm in diameter is rotating at 2.00 rev/s and comes to rest in 15.0 s. What is the angular acceleration of the wheel?
14. How much work is done in pushing a 45.5 kg wooden truck a distance of 9.75 m across the floor is the coefficient of friction is 0.250?
15. A 0.0 kW motor is 80% efficient and moves a lawn tractor at a constant 1.2 m/s. What force is being apllied to the tractor by the motor?
16. A 65.0 kg diver is poised 10.0 m above the surface of a pool. Calculate:
a) the diver's potential energy relative to the pool's surface and
b) the diver's velocity at the pool's surface.Try to solve these challenging problems! Bet you cant!?If you would like to send me a check $50 per hr labor and $100 to keep my mouth shut I did your homework, I can probably knock them out in about 2 hours.
a) what must her heading be?
b) what is her velocity relative to the bank of the river?
c) how long does it take her to cross the river?
2. What force must be exerted on an electron (mass=9.11x10^-31 kg) to move it from a state of rest to a speed of 3.5 x 10^7 m/s in a distance of 0.75 m?
3. Two satellites of equal mass are orbiting the Earth 75.0 m apart. If the gravitational force between them is 1.50 x 10^-7 N, find the mass of each.
4. A 15,000 N vehicle is parked on an incline that makes an angle of 15.0 degrees with the horizontal. If the maximum for the vehicle's brakes can withstand is 10,000 N, will the vehicle remain at rest?
5. A traffic light is supported by two wires positioned 110 degrees apart. If the maximum tension in each wire is 750 N, what is the maximum weight of the light they can support?
6. A 100-kg commuter is standing on a train accelerating at 3.70 m/s^2. What coefficient of friction must exist between the commuter's feet and the train's floor to avoid sliding?
7. A 65.0 kg crate is to be accelerated at 7.00m/s^2 up an incline making a 25.0 degree angle with the horizontal. If the coefficient of friction between the crate and the incline is 0.200, how much force is required?
8. A 400.0 N child and a 300.0 N child sit on either end of a 2.00 m long seesaw. Where along the seesaw should the pivot be placed to ensure rotational equilibrium?
9. A 250.0 N child and a 200.0 N child are attempting to lift a 500.0 N box sitting 1.00 m from the pivot of their 3.00 m long lever. If the lighter child stands on the end of the lever, where does the heavier child have to stand to balance the lever and lift the box?
10. A looping roller coaster ride at an amusement park has a radius of curvature of 7.50 m. At what minimum speed must the coaster be traveling at the top of the curve so the passengers will not fall out?
11. A 25.0 kg child moves with a speed of 1.93 m/s when sitting 12.5 m from the center of a merry-go-round. Calcuate: a) the centripetal acceleration and b) the centripetal force.
12. A merry go round has a mass of 500.0 kg and radius of 2.00m What tangential force must be applied to change its speed from 0.00 to 2.5 rad/s in 5.0 s? The frictional force is 75.0 N.
13. A spinning bicycle wheel 65.0 cm in diameter is rotating at 2.00 rev/s and comes to rest in 15.0 s. What is the angular acceleration of the wheel?
14. How much work is done in pushing a 45.5 kg wooden truck a distance of 9.75 m across the floor is the coefficient of friction is 0.250?
15. A 0.0 kW motor is 80% efficient and moves a lawn tractor at a constant 1.2 m/s. What force is being apllied to the tractor by the motor?
16. A 65.0 kg diver is poised 10.0 m above the surface of a pool. Calculate:
a) the diver's potential energy relative to the pool's surface and
b) the diver's velocity at the pool's surface.Try to solve these challenging problems! Bet you cant!?If you would like to send me a check $50 per hr labor and $100 to keep my mouth shut I did your homework, I can probably knock them out in about 2 hours.
Biology help dnt write if u gonna talk ****?
1. Sea stars live in saltwater ecosystems. Some species live in shallow tidal pools, while others live in the deepest parts of the oceans. This is a description of the ____ of sea stars. (1 point)
habitat
community
niche
none of these
2. Cougars are predators that often eat weakened or diseased animals. This is a description of the _____ of cougars.
(1 point)
habitat
community
niche
none of these
3. Nitrogen is released to the abiotic parts of the biosphere from the processes of death and _______. (1 point)
decay by bacteria
infiltration of groundwater
runoff
lightning in storm clouds
4. Referring to Figure 2-1, energy flows from ______.
Figure 2-1 (1 point)
coyotes to grasses
cats to mice
mice to cats
coyotes to cats
5. Carbon dioxide in the atmosphere enters the biotic parts of the biosphere through _______. (1 point)
burning of forests
photosynthesis
combustion of fossil fuels
all of these
6. What type of cycle is depicted in Figure 2-10?
(1 point)
carbon
water
phosphorus
nitrogen
7. Which organism shown in the pyramid in Figure 2-9 receives the highest percentage of energy from the sun?
(1 point)
fox
birds
grasshoppers
grass
8. What type of succession is most likely to happen in a burned forest? (1 point)
primary
secondary
tertiary
climax
9. You take a sample of species from the area labeled A in Figure 3-7. What would you expect to find?
(1 point)
almost no life
great species diversity
organisms that need very little oxygen
one dominant species of fish
10. What type of species would be most likely found in the area labeled D in Figure 3-7? (1 point)
one that requires plenty of oxygen
plants that require light
amphibians that need a warm habitat
decomposers that feed on dead organisms
11. The absence of permafrost and the presence of coniferous trees as the dominant climax plants characterize the ________. (1 point)
taiga
tundra
grassland
desert
12. Water and air pollution are examples of _____. (1 point)
habitat fragmentation
habitat degradation
edge effect
sustainable use
13. Island A has an area of 30 square kilometers. Island B has an area of 400 square kilometers. The islands are near each other. Which of the following statements is most likely to be true? (1 point)
Island A has greater biodiversity and a higher percentage of edge effect than Island B.
Island A has less biodiversity and a higher percentage of edge effect than Island B.
Island A has greater biodiversity and a lower percentage of edge effect than Island B.
Island A has less biodiversity and a lower percentage of edge effect than Island B.
14. What happened to species B in the graph shown in Figure 5-6? (1 point)
It increased in biodiversity.
It decreased in population slightly.
It became carnivorous.
It became extinct.
15. What effect did the loss of species B have on species A and D in Figure 5-6? (1 point)
It caused the populations of A and D to decrease.
It caused the populations of A and D to increase.
It caused the populations of A and D to become extinct.
It had no effect on the populations of A and D.
Note: Your teacher will grade your responses to questions 16?8 to ensure you receive proper credit for your answers.
16. Suppose in a population of 1,000 wild horses, there are 400 births and 220 deaths. Also, 180 new horses join the population from an area that was destroyed by fire, and 380 horses are captured by park rangers. Describe the overall change in this horse population. (2 points)
17. Describe how light affects life in the oceans. (3 points)
18. Describe four types of threats to biodiversity. (4 points)
habitat destruction - taking natural areas for housing, roads, golf courses, crops
habitat degradation - leaving the habitat there but making it of lower quality by such acts as pollution, acid precipitation, ....
introducing alien or non-native species that may take over the niches of
overhunting, overfishing, overcollecting as in overharvesting whales, overcollecting coral, capturing exotic birdBiology help dnt write if u gonna talk ****?It's better if you do your own homework. You'll learn more.Biology help dnt write if u gonna talk ****?%26quot;dnt write if u gonna talk ****%26quot;
Sorry, I speak English. I'm not sure what that strange language says.Biology help dnt write if u gonna talk ****?quote, ****, end quote
habitat
community
niche
none of these
2. Cougars are predators that often eat weakened or diseased animals. This is a description of the _____ of cougars.
(1 point)
habitat
community
niche
none of these
3. Nitrogen is released to the abiotic parts of the biosphere from the processes of death and _______. (1 point)
decay by bacteria
infiltration of groundwater
runoff
lightning in storm clouds
4. Referring to Figure 2-1, energy flows from ______.
Figure 2-1 (1 point)
coyotes to grasses
cats to mice
mice to cats
coyotes to cats
5. Carbon dioxide in the atmosphere enters the biotic parts of the biosphere through _______. (1 point)
burning of forests
photosynthesis
combustion of fossil fuels
all of these
6. What type of cycle is depicted in Figure 2-10?
(1 point)
carbon
water
phosphorus
nitrogen
7. Which organism shown in the pyramid in Figure 2-9 receives the highest percentage of energy from the sun?
(1 point)
fox
birds
grasshoppers
grass
8. What type of succession is most likely to happen in a burned forest? (1 point)
primary
secondary
tertiary
climax
9. You take a sample of species from the area labeled A in Figure 3-7. What would you expect to find?
(1 point)
almost no life
great species diversity
organisms that need very little oxygen
one dominant species of fish
10. What type of species would be most likely found in the area labeled D in Figure 3-7? (1 point)
one that requires plenty of oxygen
plants that require light
amphibians that need a warm habitat
decomposers that feed on dead organisms
11. The absence of permafrost and the presence of coniferous trees as the dominant climax plants characterize the ________. (1 point)
taiga
tundra
grassland
desert
12. Water and air pollution are examples of _____. (1 point)
habitat fragmentation
habitat degradation
edge effect
sustainable use
13. Island A has an area of 30 square kilometers. Island B has an area of 400 square kilometers. The islands are near each other. Which of the following statements is most likely to be true? (1 point)
Island A has greater biodiversity and a higher percentage of edge effect than Island B.
Island A has less biodiversity and a higher percentage of edge effect than Island B.
Island A has greater biodiversity and a lower percentage of edge effect than Island B.
Island A has less biodiversity and a lower percentage of edge effect than Island B.
14. What happened to species B in the graph shown in Figure 5-6? (1 point)
It increased in biodiversity.
It decreased in population slightly.
It became carnivorous.
It became extinct.
15. What effect did the loss of species B have on species A and D in Figure 5-6? (1 point)
It caused the populations of A and D to decrease.
It caused the populations of A and D to increase.
It caused the populations of A and D to become extinct.
It had no effect on the populations of A and D.
Note: Your teacher will grade your responses to questions 16?8 to ensure you receive proper credit for your answers.
16. Suppose in a population of 1,000 wild horses, there are 400 births and 220 deaths. Also, 180 new horses join the population from an area that was destroyed by fire, and 380 horses are captured by park rangers. Describe the overall change in this horse population. (2 points)
17. Describe how light affects life in the oceans. (3 points)
18. Describe four types of threats to biodiversity. (4 points)
habitat destruction - taking natural areas for housing, roads, golf courses, crops
habitat degradation - leaving the habitat there but making it of lower quality by such acts as pollution, acid precipitation, ....
introducing alien or non-native species that may take over the niches of
overhunting, overfishing, overcollecting as in overharvesting whales, overcollecting coral, capturing exotic birdBiology help dnt write if u gonna talk ****?It's better if you do your own homework. You'll learn more.Biology help dnt write if u gonna talk ****?%26quot;dnt write if u gonna talk ****%26quot;
Sorry, I speak English. I'm not sure what that strange language says.Biology help dnt write if u gonna talk ****?quote, ****, end quote
What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?
I tumbled through the weed and brush looking for it so I could change back. Across a small clearing and through the leaves, I saw it, my salvation. My feet pounded against the soil as I raced. I met the edge of the small lagoon and jumped in spiraling to the bottom and feeling the wild swirl of water bursting me into the air with the most graceful violence. I felt my wings sprout from my back, and my hair return to the glossy blue I have always had. My skin was once again an alabaster white with the small droplets of water glittering along its smooth surface. The spiraling water began to die off as I let the last of the whirl pool drip from my pointed toes, and allowed my self to stand upon the waters rippling surface.
I collapse right there, to tired to think, just enough energy to lie there so still and quietly. I could hear my mother’s voice now, telling me how foolish I am being.
“Torrent! Are you listening? How can you be so careless? It is your first day of boarding school, and you ran out of third period class. And you are just letting yourself sit there where people can see you! You could get discovered!” The illusion of my mother yelled wagging her flaming red finger in my face.
Mom would not get it. She is not a water faerie, just a fire faerie. She had no clue of the disadvantages I had. Mom could go by any fire and not be destroyed by the fire; she would just grow stronger while I would grow weaker. That is why I had to leave third period, we had to use a flame stove. I could feel the flesh on my skin evaporating as soon as it was turned on. People are probably worried considering I jumped out the third story window, like I could actually die like that.
A loud scream came from the distance; I could recognize the voice too. It was Mr. Coraletti, screaming my name, his lungs huffing with exasperation.
“Change…” I said clearly.
I felt the water lift me up and the brazen blue light wash over me. My skin turned to what felt like cold fire and a swift breeze washed over me. My feet tapped on something solid lightly and there I was, on the ground with my glamour on. I stumbled over to a tree that grazed on the waters edge and collapsed on the ground though I felt like pure adrenaline was being pushed through my veins. My toe lightly tapped the waters surface and a ripple was sent out.
The sound of my huffing teacher was getting closer as I closed my eyes to concentrate on not changing back into a faerie.
“Tori,” he huffed with relief and anger.
“It’s Torrent, not Tori.” I said calmly.
I opened my eyes, there stood Mr. Coraletti. His face was red and puffy, his shirt was muddy, ripped, and saturated in what smelled like sweat, to salty to be pure water.
”Torrent…” he said correcting himself “Why did you run off.” He said between puffs of air.
Hmm, well let me think, perhaps I could have died being so close to fire. Then again I knew the other reason. My face drooped down along with my neck. My fists became clenched and a tear welled in my eye, threatening to spill over.
“It’s nothing.” I growled, my voice strained.What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?It's awesome! I really love fantasy, so that's super interesting. I would LOVE it if you sent me more! simba_timmy@yahoo.com
Really, really good! :)What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?The description is pretty good, though at times it's a little much. Also I would reccomend trying to combine some of the actions so that they do not seem so choppy.
Please Read my story and review.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;…What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?You know if she is easily this affected by a stove burner then being outside in the sun would be considered suicidal. It's nice to see she doesn't care about keeping who she is a secret though, that's a new twist on these tired old stories.What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?Too flowery. Its like you're trying too hard to be shakespeare or something.What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?ya, too floweryWhat do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?i really like the intro. Is being out in the sun not bad for her? make that more clear.What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?That was great! i want to read more! :)What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?Good. :D i loveee it %26lt;3What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?i kind of like it, actually!
very descriptive.
it reminds me of Tithe, from Holly Black.
gosh, i love that series...
you have a few grammatical and spelling errors, but overall, it's pretty cool! =]]What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?i love your book so far..... i love writing books and i think you could be a good book writer...and if this is your style of writing then stick with it beccause i would love to read the book...im actually sad that theres no more. well it is very intersting it does have grammer mistakes but publishers fix that...so keep writing it!!!What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?AMAZING!!! The description in this isn't too much at ALL. It's perfect!! It's got great imagery. I could imagine the scene in my head. =] Excellent, I'm so jealous. XD (I might wanna become a writer someday too. ^^) You're an amazing writer; keep doing what you're doing. ^_^What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?It sounded cool. I want to be an author too, and I'm writing a bunch of stories, but nothing like that. It was really good. I think you should change the whole jumping out of the window thing. That's a bit much! But, I liked how if she said %26quot;change%26quot; she would change. It was good for starters, but it needs more detail.What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?It sounds good. I like the plot. But it just might be a little too descriptive. At least for me. Good luck!
Please answer mine! http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;…What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?That was pretty good!
And thanks for answering my question!!!What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?fo sho way tooooo flowery. what r u tryin to b an auther or somthin????????????
I collapse right there, to tired to think, just enough energy to lie there so still and quietly. I could hear my mother’s voice now, telling me how foolish I am being.
“Torrent! Are you listening? How can you be so careless? It is your first day of boarding school, and you ran out of third period class. And you are just letting yourself sit there where people can see you! You could get discovered!” The illusion of my mother yelled wagging her flaming red finger in my face.
Mom would not get it. She is not a water faerie, just a fire faerie. She had no clue of the disadvantages I had. Mom could go by any fire and not be destroyed by the fire; she would just grow stronger while I would grow weaker. That is why I had to leave third period, we had to use a flame stove. I could feel the flesh on my skin evaporating as soon as it was turned on. People are probably worried considering I jumped out the third story window, like I could actually die like that.
A loud scream came from the distance; I could recognize the voice too. It was Mr. Coraletti, screaming my name, his lungs huffing with exasperation.
“Change…” I said clearly.
I felt the water lift me up and the brazen blue light wash over me. My skin turned to what felt like cold fire and a swift breeze washed over me. My feet tapped on something solid lightly and there I was, on the ground with my glamour on. I stumbled over to a tree that grazed on the waters edge and collapsed on the ground though I felt like pure adrenaline was being pushed through my veins. My toe lightly tapped the waters surface and a ripple was sent out.
The sound of my huffing teacher was getting closer as I closed my eyes to concentrate on not changing back into a faerie.
“Tori,” he huffed with relief and anger.
“It’s Torrent, not Tori.” I said calmly.
I opened my eyes, there stood Mr. Coraletti. His face was red and puffy, his shirt was muddy, ripped, and saturated in what smelled like sweat, to salty to be pure water.
”Torrent…” he said correcting himself “Why did you run off.” He said between puffs of air.
Hmm, well let me think, perhaps I could have died being so close to fire. Then again I knew the other reason. My face drooped down along with my neck. My fists became clenched and a tear welled in my eye, threatening to spill over.
“It’s nothing.” I growled, my voice strained.What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?It's awesome! I really love fantasy, so that's super interesting. I would LOVE it if you sent me more! simba_timmy@yahoo.com
Really, really good! :)What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?The description is pretty good, though at times it's a little much. Also I would reccomend trying to combine some of the actions so that they do not seem so choppy.
Please Read my story and review.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;…What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?You know if she is easily this affected by a stove burner then being outside in the sun would be considered suicidal. It's nice to see she doesn't care about keeping who she is a secret though, that's a new twist on these tired old stories.What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?Too flowery. Its like you're trying too hard to be shakespeare or something.What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?ya, too floweryWhat do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?i really like the intro. Is being out in the sun not bad for her? make that more clear.What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?That was great! i want to read more! :)What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?Good. :D i loveee it %26lt;3What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?i kind of like it, actually!
very descriptive.
it reminds me of Tithe, from Holly Black.
gosh, i love that series...
you have a few grammatical and spelling errors, but overall, it's pretty cool! =]]What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?i love your book so far..... i love writing books and i think you could be a good book writer...and if this is your style of writing then stick with it beccause i would love to read the book...im actually sad that theres no more. well it is very intersting it does have grammer mistakes but publishers fix that...so keep writing it!!!What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?AMAZING!!! The description in this isn't too much at ALL. It's perfect!! It's got great imagery. I could imagine the scene in my head. =] Excellent, I'm so jealous. XD (I might wanna become a writer someday too. ^^) You're an amazing writer; keep doing what you're doing. ^_^What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?It sounded cool. I want to be an author too, and I'm writing a bunch of stories, but nothing like that. It was really good. I think you should change the whole jumping out of the window thing. That's a bit much! But, I liked how if she said %26quot;change%26quot; she would change. It was good for starters, but it needs more detail.What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?It sounds good. I like the plot. But it just might be a little too descriptive. At least for me. Good luck!
Please answer mine! http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;…What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?That was pretty good!
And thanks for answering my question!!!What do you think of my story? PLEASE! PLEASE! ANSWER! PLEASE!?fo sho way tooooo flowery. what r u tryin to b an auther or somthin????????????
What do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?
It is not as long as it looks. Please, read.
Chapter One
Meeting Waters Edge
Torrent
I tumbled through the weed and brush looking for it so I could change back. Across a small clearing and through the leaves, I saw it, my salvation. My bare feet pounded against the soil racing fervently. I met the edge of the small lagoon and jumped in spiraling to the bottom and feeling the wild swirl of water bursting me into the air with the most graceful violence. I felt my wings sprout from my back, and my hair return to the glossy blue I have always had. My skin was once again an alabaster white with the small droplets of water glittering along its smooth surface. The spiraling water began to die off as I let the last of the whirl pool drip from my pointed toes, and allowed my self to stand upon the waters rippling surface.
I collapse right there, to tired to think, just enough energy to lie there so still and quietly. I could hear my mother’s voice now, telling me how foolish I am being.
“Torrent! Are you listening? How can you be so careless? It is your first day of boarding school, and you ran out of third period class. And you are just letting yourself sit there where people can see you! You could get discovered!” The illusion of my mother yelled wagging her flaming red finger in my face.
Mom would not get it. She is not like me, the pissy yet meek water faerie. She was only the pissy and old fire faerie. She had no clue of the disadvantages I had. Mom could go by any fire and not be destroyed; she would just grow stronger while I would grow weaker. That is why I had to leave third period, we had to use a flame stove. I could feel the flesh on my skin evaporating as soon as it was turned on. People are probably worried considering I jumped out the third story window, like I could actually die like that.
A loud scream came from the distance; I could recognize the voice too. It was Mr. Coraletti, screaming my name, his lungs huffing with exasperation.
“Change…” I said clearly.
I felt the water lift me up and the brazen blue light wash over me. My skin turned to what felt like cold fire and a swift breeze washed over me. My feet tapped on something solid lightly and there I was, on the ground with my glamour on. I stumbled over to a tree that grazed on the waters edge and collapsed on the ground though I felt like pure adrenaline was being pushed through my veins. My toe lightly tapped the waters surface and a ripple was sent out.
The sound of my huffing teacher was getting closer as I closed my eyes to concentrate on not changing back into a faerie.
“Tori,” he huffed with relief and anger.
“It’s Torrent, not Tori.” I said calmly.
I opened my eyes, there stood Mr. Coraletti. His face was red and puffy, his shirt was muddy, ripped, and saturated in what smelled like sweat, to salty to be pure water.
”Torrent…” he said correcting himself “Why did you run off.” He said between puffs of air.
Hmm, well let me think, perhaps I could have died being so close to fire. Then again I knew the other reason. My face drooped down along with my neck. My fists became clenched and a tear welled in my eye, threatening to spill over.
“It’s nothing.” I growled, my voice strained.
He sat against the tree next to me allowing his breath to even out before he spoke.
“Torrent,” he said with concern on his face “what is the matter?”
I clenched my fist more trying to keep my breathing steady but knew for a fact, that I could not. The memory was too livid, unable to leave me feeling comfortable. Scary, sad, and bitter is that memory. I began to hyperventilate in panic.
Mr. Coraletti looked at me, eyes filled with wonder “Is something wrong?”
Yes, there is something wrong Mr. Coraletti, why do you think I am hyperventilating? Truly, it is sad, but you will never know Mr. Coraletti. You will not know or understand ever. I felt the memory pass through me as if it were going ten times faster then it happened. I shook it off avoiding the reminiscence.
When I returned to reality I realized I was gasping for more and more air, my eyes thick with tears and Mr. Coraletti’s hand on my shoulder. He was looking at me, I could tell he wanted an explanation but he, he was not getting one.
I brushed his hand off and stood up keeping my position strong… dominant, though for my small size it was strange. He stood up too and tried reaching for my arm. That is when I ran, and ran, and ran. I thought I would never stop. I only stopped when something hit my head and knocked me out.
what do you think? Would you read more? What should I fix? Ect?What do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?OMG! I like this!
I would definitely love to read more! I love the faerie idea. But I find the idea that she would evaporate, a little far. Maybe she would, become dehydrated, but please? Evaporate?
Oh, and also the fact that the teacher is the guy who follows her seems a little strange to me. I would have enjoyed it better if it was the tall, handsome jock bully-type person was following her. This would have made it a teeny bit more interesting.
I find her name a little strange to. Torrent? Isn't that a guy's name? (No offence if you really like that name.) Why don't instead you look up greek names about water. That's what I did for my story, I found names with astrlogical meanings to them. it make you have interesting names with a little bit of a hidden meaning.
I'm really interested in reading more of your story. Could you email me the rest?? (If you have it of course)
sammyh001 (at) gmail (dot) com
thanks
%26lt;3
sammyhWhat do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?wow
thats really good
but i have to clue why Torrent is so upset and/or mad....=/
and yea i would want to read more=)What do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?O.O Can i read more PLEASE? Its like Perfect.What do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?Great! I would read more! Keep going!! you should try to publish it! ;p
Whats it called?What do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?hmmmmmm...i really like this...its interesting and has that mysterious quality to it....and the hook definetiley has a good feeling to it...my only change would be to add a little more description about the incident that your character ran away from so we have a little bit more understandingWhat do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?My eyes are working fine and I know this is a long passage to ask someone to read. You would be better off including small bites of it. Also it would help if you separated each paragraph with a space.how to cope with a breakup about interracial couples
Chapter One
Meeting Waters Edge
Torrent
I tumbled through the weed and brush looking for it so I could change back. Across a small clearing and through the leaves, I saw it, my salvation. My bare feet pounded against the soil racing fervently. I met the edge of the small lagoon and jumped in spiraling to the bottom and feeling the wild swirl of water bursting me into the air with the most graceful violence. I felt my wings sprout from my back, and my hair return to the glossy blue I have always had. My skin was once again an alabaster white with the small droplets of water glittering along its smooth surface. The spiraling water began to die off as I let the last of the whirl pool drip from my pointed toes, and allowed my self to stand upon the waters rippling surface.
I collapse right there, to tired to think, just enough energy to lie there so still and quietly. I could hear my mother’s voice now, telling me how foolish I am being.
“Torrent! Are you listening? How can you be so careless? It is your first day of boarding school, and you ran out of third period class. And you are just letting yourself sit there where people can see you! You could get discovered!” The illusion of my mother yelled wagging her flaming red finger in my face.
Mom would not get it. She is not like me, the pissy yet meek water faerie. She was only the pissy and old fire faerie. She had no clue of the disadvantages I had. Mom could go by any fire and not be destroyed; she would just grow stronger while I would grow weaker. That is why I had to leave third period, we had to use a flame stove. I could feel the flesh on my skin evaporating as soon as it was turned on. People are probably worried considering I jumped out the third story window, like I could actually die like that.
A loud scream came from the distance; I could recognize the voice too. It was Mr. Coraletti, screaming my name, his lungs huffing with exasperation.
“Change…” I said clearly.
I felt the water lift me up and the brazen blue light wash over me. My skin turned to what felt like cold fire and a swift breeze washed over me. My feet tapped on something solid lightly and there I was, on the ground with my glamour on. I stumbled over to a tree that grazed on the waters edge and collapsed on the ground though I felt like pure adrenaline was being pushed through my veins. My toe lightly tapped the waters surface and a ripple was sent out.
The sound of my huffing teacher was getting closer as I closed my eyes to concentrate on not changing back into a faerie.
“Tori,” he huffed with relief and anger.
“It’s Torrent, not Tori.” I said calmly.
I opened my eyes, there stood Mr. Coraletti. His face was red and puffy, his shirt was muddy, ripped, and saturated in what smelled like sweat, to salty to be pure water.
”Torrent…” he said correcting himself “Why did you run off.” He said between puffs of air.
Hmm, well let me think, perhaps I could have died being so close to fire. Then again I knew the other reason. My face drooped down along with my neck. My fists became clenched and a tear welled in my eye, threatening to spill over.
“It’s nothing.” I growled, my voice strained.
He sat against the tree next to me allowing his breath to even out before he spoke.
“Torrent,” he said with concern on his face “what is the matter?”
I clenched my fist more trying to keep my breathing steady but knew for a fact, that I could not. The memory was too livid, unable to leave me feeling comfortable. Scary, sad, and bitter is that memory. I began to hyperventilate in panic.
Mr. Coraletti looked at me, eyes filled with wonder “Is something wrong?”
Yes, there is something wrong Mr. Coraletti, why do you think I am hyperventilating? Truly, it is sad, but you will never know Mr. Coraletti. You will not know or understand ever. I felt the memory pass through me as if it were going ten times faster then it happened. I shook it off avoiding the reminiscence.
When I returned to reality I realized I was gasping for more and more air, my eyes thick with tears and Mr. Coraletti’s hand on my shoulder. He was looking at me, I could tell he wanted an explanation but he, he was not getting one.
I brushed his hand off and stood up keeping my position strong… dominant, though for my small size it was strange. He stood up too and tried reaching for my arm. That is when I ran, and ran, and ran. I thought I would never stop. I only stopped when something hit my head and knocked me out.
what do you think? Would you read more? What should I fix? Ect?What do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?OMG! I like this!
I would definitely love to read more! I love the faerie idea. But I find the idea that she would evaporate, a little far. Maybe she would, become dehydrated, but please? Evaporate?
Oh, and also the fact that the teacher is the guy who follows her seems a little strange to me. I would have enjoyed it better if it was the tall, handsome jock bully-type person was following her. This would have made it a teeny bit more interesting.
I find her name a little strange to. Torrent? Isn't that a guy's name? (No offence if you really like that name.) Why don't instead you look up greek names about water. That's what I did for my story, I found names with astrlogical meanings to them. it make you have interesting names with a little bit of a hidden meaning.
I'm really interested in reading more of your story. Could you email me the rest?? (If you have it of course)
sammyh001 (at) gmail (dot) com
thanks
%26lt;3
sammyhWhat do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?wow
thats really good
but i have to clue why Torrent is so upset and/or mad....=/
and yea i would want to read more=)What do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?O.O Can i read more PLEASE? Its like Perfect.What do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?Great! I would read more! Keep going!! you should try to publish it! ;p
Whats it called?What do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?hmmmmmm...i really like this...its interesting and has that mysterious quality to it....and the hook definetiley has a good feeling to it...my only change would be to add a little more description about the incident that your character ran away from so we have a little bit more understandingWhat do you think about my story opening? Constructive criticism please!?My eyes are working fine and I know this is a long passage to ask someone to read. You would be better off including small bites of it. Also it would help if you separated each paragraph with a space.
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY BOOK? PLEASE ANSWER!?
*************************IT IS NOT AS LONG AS IT LOOKS!***************
I tumbled through the weed and brush looking for it so I could change back. Across a small clearing and through the leaves, I saw it, my salvation. My bare feet pounded against the soil as I raced. I met the edge of the small lagoon and jumped in spiraling to the bottom and feeling the wild swirl of water bursting me into the air with the most graceful violence. I felt my wings sprout from my back, and my hair return to the glossy blue I have always had. My skin was once again an alabaster white with the small droplets of water glittering along its smooth surface. The spiraling water began to die off as I let the last of the whirl pool drip from my pointed toes, and allowed my self to stand upon the waters rippling surface.
I collapse right there, to tired to think, just enough energy to lie there so still and quietly. I could hear my mother’s voice now, telling me how foolish I am being.
“Torrent! Are you listening? How can you be so careless? It is your first day of boarding school, and you ran out of third period class. And you are just letting yourself sit there where people can see you! You could get discovered!” The illusion of my mother yelled wagging her flaming red finger in my face.
Mom would not get it. She is not a water faerie, just a fire faerie. She had no clue of the disadvantages I had. Mom could go by any fire and not be destroyed by the fire; she would just grow stronger while I would grow weaker. That is why I had to leave third period, we had to use a flame stove. I could feel the flesh on my skin evaporating as soon as it was turned on. People are probably worried considering I jumped out the third story window, like I could actually die like that.
A loud scream came from the distance; I could recognize the voice too. It was Mr. Coraletti, screaming my name, his lungs huffing with exasperation.
“Change…” I said clearly.
I felt the water lift me up and the brazen blue light wash over me. My skin turned to what felt like cold fire and a swift breeze washed over me. My feet tapped on something solid lightly and there I was, on the ground with my glamour on. I stumbled over to a tree that grazed on the waters edge and collapsed on the ground though I felt like pure adrenaline was being pushed through my veins. My toe lightly tapped the waters surface and a ripple was sent out.
The sound of my huffing teacher was getting closer as I closed my eyes to concentrate on not changing back into a faerie.
“Tori,” he huffed with relief and anger.
“It’s Torrent, not Tori.” I said calmly.
I opened my eyes, there stood Mr. Coraletti. His face was red and puffy, his shirt was muddy, ripped, and saturated in what smelled like sweat, to salty to be pure water.
”Torrent…” he said correcting himself “Why did you run off.” He said between puffs of air.
Hmm, well let me think, perhaps I could have died being so close to fire. Then again I knew the other reason. My face drooped down along with my neck. My fists became clenched and a tear welled in my eye, threatening to spill over.
“It’s nothing.” I growled, my voice strained.
He sat against the tree next to me allowing his breath to even out before he spoke.
“Torrent,” he said with concern on his face “what is the matter?”
I clenched my fist more trying to keep my breathing steady but knew for a fact, that I could not. I began to hyperventilate,
Mr. Coraletti looked at me, eyes filled with wonder “Is something wrong?”
Yes, there is something wrong Mr. Coraletti, why do you think I am hyperventilating? Truly, it is sad. I shuddered having the memory return. There I was twelve again, sitting inside the boat house with Dad. He was teaching me how to control water like him. He was so talented. That is when mom came storming in. Her hair was flaming red her eyes angrier than what seemed possible. I stared at her along with my father. Her eyes gaze was directed at my dad, she spoke one word only “Cheater…” She said her voice trembling with sorrow and anger at the same time. I was truly afraid, her eyes were piercing, threatening. I thought she would have killed me. I stared at her longer and then, then I felt the heat; mother had set the boat house on fire. The wood beneath me collapsed and I was in the water. I immediately looked around for dad, but I knew then… he was already dead. He could not even make it into the water. What was this emotion I felt? What? Fear? Yes, fear. Or is it sorrow? Yes Sorrow.
When I returned to reality I realized I was gasping for more and more air, my eyes thick with tears and Mr. Coraletti’s hand on my shoulder. He was looking at me, I could tell he wanted an explanation but he was not getting one.
I brushed his hand off and stood up keeping my position strong. He stood up too. That is when I ran, and ran, and ran. I thought I would never stop. I only stopped when something hit my head and knocked me oWHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY BOOK? PLEASE ANSWER!?omg! u r such a great writer....i luved ur story.....u r a true author!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY BOOK? PLEASE ANSWER!?I like it, Rachel! Its interesting, and keeping me going.
You liked mine? I'm going to post the second %26quot;mental date%26quot; in a little bit if you want to read it. It kind of introduces a few characters, but not completely.WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY BOOK? PLEASE ANSWER!?It's great! Keep going, I want to know what hit her head!WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY BOOK? PLEASE ANSWER!?It sounds good. keep going. i'm a bit confused tho. is she in a school for faries or is she pretending to be human?WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY BOOK? PLEASE ANSWER!?OKay,I think the plot line is very very good and creative,
I think you could work a little bit on dialogue and also making your descriptions flow.
Overall,it kept me interested, but I don't think the flashback popping up in that spot made the most sense....you might consider replacing.
I'd love to read more^^
Good luck and KEEP WRITING
I tumbled through the weed and brush looking for it so I could change back. Across a small clearing and through the leaves, I saw it, my salvation. My bare feet pounded against the soil as I raced. I met the edge of the small lagoon and jumped in spiraling to the bottom and feeling the wild swirl of water bursting me into the air with the most graceful violence. I felt my wings sprout from my back, and my hair return to the glossy blue I have always had. My skin was once again an alabaster white with the small droplets of water glittering along its smooth surface. The spiraling water began to die off as I let the last of the whirl pool drip from my pointed toes, and allowed my self to stand upon the waters rippling surface.
I collapse right there, to tired to think, just enough energy to lie there so still and quietly. I could hear my mother’s voice now, telling me how foolish I am being.
“Torrent! Are you listening? How can you be so careless? It is your first day of boarding school, and you ran out of third period class. And you are just letting yourself sit there where people can see you! You could get discovered!” The illusion of my mother yelled wagging her flaming red finger in my face.
Mom would not get it. She is not a water faerie, just a fire faerie. She had no clue of the disadvantages I had. Mom could go by any fire and not be destroyed by the fire; she would just grow stronger while I would grow weaker. That is why I had to leave third period, we had to use a flame stove. I could feel the flesh on my skin evaporating as soon as it was turned on. People are probably worried considering I jumped out the third story window, like I could actually die like that.
A loud scream came from the distance; I could recognize the voice too. It was Mr. Coraletti, screaming my name, his lungs huffing with exasperation.
“Change…” I said clearly.
I felt the water lift me up and the brazen blue light wash over me. My skin turned to what felt like cold fire and a swift breeze washed over me. My feet tapped on something solid lightly and there I was, on the ground with my glamour on. I stumbled over to a tree that grazed on the waters edge and collapsed on the ground though I felt like pure adrenaline was being pushed through my veins. My toe lightly tapped the waters surface and a ripple was sent out.
The sound of my huffing teacher was getting closer as I closed my eyes to concentrate on not changing back into a faerie.
“Tori,” he huffed with relief and anger.
“It’s Torrent, not Tori.” I said calmly.
I opened my eyes, there stood Mr. Coraletti. His face was red and puffy, his shirt was muddy, ripped, and saturated in what smelled like sweat, to salty to be pure water.
”Torrent…” he said correcting himself “Why did you run off.” He said between puffs of air.
Hmm, well let me think, perhaps I could have died being so close to fire. Then again I knew the other reason. My face drooped down along with my neck. My fists became clenched and a tear welled in my eye, threatening to spill over.
“It’s nothing.” I growled, my voice strained.
He sat against the tree next to me allowing his breath to even out before he spoke.
“Torrent,” he said with concern on his face “what is the matter?”
I clenched my fist more trying to keep my breathing steady but knew for a fact, that I could not. I began to hyperventilate,
Mr. Coraletti looked at me, eyes filled with wonder “Is something wrong?”
Yes, there is something wrong Mr. Coraletti, why do you think I am hyperventilating? Truly, it is sad. I shuddered having the memory return. There I was twelve again, sitting inside the boat house with Dad. He was teaching me how to control water like him. He was so talented. That is when mom came storming in. Her hair was flaming red her eyes angrier than what seemed possible. I stared at her along with my father. Her eyes gaze was directed at my dad, she spoke one word only “Cheater…” She said her voice trembling with sorrow and anger at the same time. I was truly afraid, her eyes were piercing, threatening. I thought she would have killed me. I stared at her longer and then, then I felt the heat; mother had set the boat house on fire. The wood beneath me collapsed and I was in the water. I immediately looked around for dad, but I knew then… he was already dead. He could not even make it into the water. What was this emotion I felt? What? Fear? Yes, fear. Or is it sorrow? Yes Sorrow.
When I returned to reality I realized I was gasping for more and more air, my eyes thick with tears and Mr. Coraletti’s hand on my shoulder. He was looking at me, I could tell he wanted an explanation but he was not getting one.
I brushed his hand off and stood up keeping my position strong. He stood up too. That is when I ran, and ran, and ran. I thought I would never stop. I only stopped when something hit my head and knocked me oWHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY BOOK? PLEASE ANSWER!?omg! u r such a great writer....i luved ur story.....u r a true author!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY BOOK? PLEASE ANSWER!?I like it, Rachel! Its interesting, and keeping me going.
You liked mine? I'm going to post the second %26quot;mental date%26quot; in a little bit if you want to read it. It kind of introduces a few characters, but not completely.WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY BOOK? PLEASE ANSWER!?It's great! Keep going, I want to know what hit her head!WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY BOOK? PLEASE ANSWER!?It sounds good. keep going. i'm a bit confused tho. is she in a school for faries or is she pretending to be human?WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY BOOK? PLEASE ANSWER!?OKay,I think the plot line is very very good and creative,
I think you could work a little bit on dialogue and also making your descriptions flow.
Overall,it kept me interested, but I don't think the flashback popping up in that spot made the most sense....you might consider replacing.
I'd love to read more^^
Good luck and KEEP WRITING
First chapter of my book??? Critique? ?
I tumbled through the weed and brush looking for it so I could change back. Across a small clearing and through the leaves, I saw it, my salvation. My feet pounded against the soil as I raced. I met the edge of the small lagoon and jumped in spiraling to the bottom and feeling the wild swirl of water bursting me into the air with the most graceful violence. I felt my wings sprout from my back, and my hair return to the glossy blue I have always had. My skin was once again an alabaster white with the small droplets of water glittering along its smooth surface. The spiraling water began to die off as I let the last of the whirl pool drip from my pointed toes, and allowed my self to stand upon the waters rippling surface.
I collapse right there, to tired to think, just enough energy to lie there so still and quietly. I could hear my mother’s voice now, telling me how foolish I am being.
“Torrent! Are you listening? How can you be so careless? It is your first day of boarding school, and you ran out of third period class. And you are just letting yourself sit there where people can see you! You could get discovered!” The illusion of my mother yelled wagging her flaming red finger in my face.
Mom would not get it. She is not a water faerie, just a fire faerie. She had no clue of the disadvantages I had. Mom could go by any fire and not be destroyed by the fire; she would just grow stronger while I would grow weaker. That is why I had to leave third period, we had to use a flame stove. I could feel the flesh on my skin evaporating as soon as it was turned on. People are probably worried considering I jumped out the third story window, like I could actually die like that.
A loud scream came from the distance; I could recognize the voice too. It was Mr. Coraletti, screaming my name, his lungs huffing with exasperation.
“Change…” I said clearly.
I felt the water lift me up and the brazen blue light wash over me. My skin turned to what felt like cold fire and a swift breeze washed over me. My feet tapped on something solid lightly and there I was, on the ground with my glamour on. I stumbled over to a tree that grazed on the waters edge and collapsed on the ground though I felt like pure adrenaline was being pushed through my veins. My toe lightly tapped the waters surface and a ripple was sent out.
The sound of my huffing teacher was getting closer as I closed my eyes to concentrate on not changing back into a faerie.
“Tori,” he huffed with relief and anger.
“It’s Torrent, not Tori.” I said calmly.
I opened my eyes, there stood Mr. Coraletti. His face was red and puffy, his shirt was muddy, ripped, and saturated in what smelled like sweat, to salty to be pure water.
”Torrent…” he said correcting himself “Why did you run off.” He said between puffs of air.
Hmm, well let me think, perhaps I could have died being so close to fire. Then again I knew the other reason. My face drooped down along with my neck. My fists became clenched and a tear dribbled down the side of my face. Mr. Coraletti looked at me, his puffy, red face smattered with surprise. He sat against the tree next to me allowing his breath to even out.
“Torrent,” he said with concern on his face “what is the matter?”
I clenched my fist more trying to keep my breathing steady but knew for a fact, that I could not. A small sob escaped my chest and one word came out, “Dad…” I whispered my voice thick with sorrow.
Mr. Coraletti looked at me, eyes sympathetic and filled with wonder “What about your dad?” he pressed.
I shuddered having the memory return. There I was twelve again, sitting inside the boat house when mom came storming in. Her hair was flaming red her eyes angrier than what seemed possible. I stared at her along with my father. Her eyes gaze was directed at my dad, she spoke one word only “Cheater…” She said her voice trembling with sorrow and anger at the same time. I shuddered and then felt the heat; mother had set the boat house on fire. The wood beneath me collapsed and I was in the water. I immediately looked around for dad, but I knew then… he was already dead. He could not even make it into the water.
When I returned to reality I realized I was sobbing even louder, my eyes thick with tears and Mr. Coraletti’s hand on my shoulder. He was looking at me, I could tell he wanted an explanation but he would not press me for one any longer.
I brushed his hand off and stood up keeping my position strong. He stood up too. That is when I ran, and ran, and ran. I thought I would never stop. I only stopped when something hit my head and knocked me out.
please critique, opinions, ideas? If this was a published book, would you read farther?First chapter of my book??? Critique? ?it was great. i would read it yes. in fact i would like to keep reading it right now. i love your description the way to flows. though a few of the transition from explanation to explanation. like the being in class and then back to the water and then to the story about the character's father was a little shaky. i think a little more wording should be added to help transition on. but other than that don't change anything. i like that u didn't say right away what she was it had me curious:)
good luck!:)First chapter of my book??? Critique? ?As sson as I started reaaing it, it was awesome lol, Good!!!!!!!!!
I love it want to read moreFirst chapter of my book??? Critique? ?really good, i would definitely read this to the end if it was published and i could get my hands on it.
all i got to say is that u did a awesome job, you hooked me by the end of it which you just proves you got real talent hereFirst chapter of my book??? Critique? ?I liked it actually, I liked it a lot, I want to read more. You do need some work in some areas though, I would recommend you to go to http://fromthehaert.wetpaint.com/?mail=1… and post your writing there, that is where I do, check it out.
I collapse right there, to tired to think, just enough energy to lie there so still and quietly. I could hear my mother’s voice now, telling me how foolish I am being.
“Torrent! Are you listening? How can you be so careless? It is your first day of boarding school, and you ran out of third period class. And you are just letting yourself sit there where people can see you! You could get discovered!” The illusion of my mother yelled wagging her flaming red finger in my face.
Mom would not get it. She is not a water faerie, just a fire faerie. She had no clue of the disadvantages I had. Mom could go by any fire and not be destroyed by the fire; she would just grow stronger while I would grow weaker. That is why I had to leave third period, we had to use a flame stove. I could feel the flesh on my skin evaporating as soon as it was turned on. People are probably worried considering I jumped out the third story window, like I could actually die like that.
A loud scream came from the distance; I could recognize the voice too. It was Mr. Coraletti, screaming my name, his lungs huffing with exasperation.
“Change…” I said clearly.
I felt the water lift me up and the brazen blue light wash over me. My skin turned to what felt like cold fire and a swift breeze washed over me. My feet tapped on something solid lightly and there I was, on the ground with my glamour on. I stumbled over to a tree that grazed on the waters edge and collapsed on the ground though I felt like pure adrenaline was being pushed through my veins. My toe lightly tapped the waters surface and a ripple was sent out.
The sound of my huffing teacher was getting closer as I closed my eyes to concentrate on not changing back into a faerie.
“Tori,” he huffed with relief and anger.
“It’s Torrent, not Tori.” I said calmly.
I opened my eyes, there stood Mr. Coraletti. His face was red and puffy, his shirt was muddy, ripped, and saturated in what smelled like sweat, to salty to be pure water.
”Torrent…” he said correcting himself “Why did you run off.” He said between puffs of air.
Hmm, well let me think, perhaps I could have died being so close to fire. Then again I knew the other reason. My face drooped down along with my neck. My fists became clenched and a tear dribbled down the side of my face. Mr. Coraletti looked at me, his puffy, red face smattered with surprise. He sat against the tree next to me allowing his breath to even out.
“Torrent,” he said with concern on his face “what is the matter?”
I clenched my fist more trying to keep my breathing steady but knew for a fact, that I could not. A small sob escaped my chest and one word came out, “Dad…” I whispered my voice thick with sorrow.
Mr. Coraletti looked at me, eyes sympathetic and filled with wonder “What about your dad?” he pressed.
I shuddered having the memory return. There I was twelve again, sitting inside the boat house when mom came storming in. Her hair was flaming red her eyes angrier than what seemed possible. I stared at her along with my father. Her eyes gaze was directed at my dad, she spoke one word only “Cheater…” She said her voice trembling with sorrow and anger at the same time. I shuddered and then felt the heat; mother had set the boat house on fire. The wood beneath me collapsed and I was in the water. I immediately looked around for dad, but I knew then… he was already dead. He could not even make it into the water.
When I returned to reality I realized I was sobbing even louder, my eyes thick with tears and Mr. Coraletti’s hand on my shoulder. He was looking at me, I could tell he wanted an explanation but he would not press me for one any longer.
I brushed his hand off and stood up keeping my position strong. He stood up too. That is when I ran, and ran, and ran. I thought I would never stop. I only stopped when something hit my head and knocked me out.
please critique, opinions, ideas? If this was a published book, would you read farther?First chapter of my book??? Critique? ?it was great. i would read it yes. in fact i would like to keep reading it right now. i love your description the way to flows. though a few of the transition from explanation to explanation. like the being in class and then back to the water and then to the story about the character's father was a little shaky. i think a little more wording should be added to help transition on. but other than that don't change anything. i like that u didn't say right away what she was it had me curious:)
good luck!:)First chapter of my book??? Critique? ?As sson as I started reaaing it, it was awesome lol, Good!!!!!!!!!
I love it want to read moreFirst chapter of my book??? Critique? ?really good, i would definitely read this to the end if it was published and i could get my hands on it.
all i got to say is that u did a awesome job, you hooked me by the end of it which you just proves you got real talent hereFirst chapter of my book??? Critique? ?I liked it actually, I liked it a lot, I want to read more. You do need some work in some areas though, I would recommend you to go to http://fromthehaert.wetpaint.com/?mail=1… and post your writing there, that is where I do, check it out.
How is my story (draft prologue and first chapter)?
This is the prologue and chapter of a story I'm writing, I would like to hear your ideas about it. One day I really want to be a published author.
Prologue
The moonlight made everything in the forest silver. The forest was silent, there was no bird song, no crickets, no rustling in the trees. It was as if the moonlight had frozen time itself. There was no movement; it was as if the forest was made of ice.
In the middle of the forest, there was a small pool of water. The pool was coated with a small layer of ice, even though it was summer. The ice wasn’t white; it reflected the moon and the stars as if it was a mirror. This pool was the forest’s centre, no trees grew around the edges of the pool, it was a perfect circle and a circle of trees surrounded it, all the same distance from the water.
It was almost midnight. The moon was full and high in the sky; it was the largest it had ever been in many years. It was a perfect white; the stars around it seemed dimmer.
Suddenly the silence was broken. It was broken with the snapping of a twig. Its small sound echoed around the forest.
Two wolves entered the clearing. One, a pure white she-wolf and the other, a pure black male wolf. The male wolf walked to the opposite side of the clearing, standing in the exact position of south, and the she-wolf stood to the north. They both took a couple of steps forward, their paws almost touching the sides of the pool.
“Kamira, the time has almost come. Are you sure it is tonight?” the black male wolf barked, red eyes gleaming and staring into the she-wolf, Kamira’s green eyes.
“Omatu it is tonight! Don’t question the spirits!” Kamira growled lightly, returning his gaze. Omatu lowered his gaze in a sign of submission. He looked up with a apologetic gaze and Kamira flicked her ear in forgiveness. Omatu took a breath then lightly barked to her,
“Where is the saviour then? It is almost midnight! Where is the human?” Kamira gave a light growl at him. He always asked questions.
“Patience Omatu! There is still time left. The human will come soon.” Omatu growled at Kamira but, without a sign they both disappeared into the shadows simultaneously.
Chapter 1
Yairin sat up straight in her bed. She was in a cold sweat. Her bed clothes were soaked with her sweat. Her dream, she had to remember it. Silently she closed her eyes and tried to cling onto the last snippets of her dream. It was like trying to hold water with your bare hands. All she could remember was that the two wolves in the forest were waiting for something, something very important. Upset at not being able to remember her dream, Yairin got up from her bed.
The sheets were full of her sweat. Oh well, the servants would replace them tomorrow, they always replaced her sheets, even if they were clean. As quietly as she could, Yairin put her feet onto the stone floor, it was made of the finest marble but that didn’t change the fact it was cold. She quickly recoiled her feet and put them into her slippers, the soft fur quickly making her feet warm.
Her mouth emitted a sigh of satisfaction; using her arms she pushed herself out of her huge bed. The sheets were made of the finest cotton, her quilt made by the best quilters. Her feet passed over the carpets, without realising it she was heading towards the window.
Her long slender hands rested against the cold stone ledge. Making sure no one was looking; Yairin took a deep breath and stuck her head out of the window. She closed her eyes and breathed in the freshening night air. She opened her eyes and let out a silent gasp. She had never seen the moon so big and such a pure shade of white! Its light made everything look silver, she imagined how her own, raven black hair must look in this light. She quickly undid her hair bun. Slowly her thick black hair ran down her shoulders, becoming a river of thick wavy black hair. As it stopped unfurling around the small of her back she pulled some so it was in sight of her eyes. ‘That’s strange; my hair is still the same…’ Confused, Yairin looked for the burnt forest. It was always black, but it was a shade of silver. Unconsciously, Yairin looked down at her hands. They weren’t silver; they were the same olive colour they always were.
Still utterly confused she went back inside, and grabbed her hand mirror. She leant out the window again and took a look into the mirror. Her face was still its olive colour; her hair framed it perfectly in black. Her naturally high hair line was considered a rare sign of beauty. Her lips were still the same rose red and her eyes; they were the same ice blue. She closed her eyes and took some deep breaths.
Suddenly a very sharp wind raced through her window. As the wind passed over her ears it seemed to be whispering, ‘The SilverForest…’ Yairin opened her eyes; there was a gleam of determination shining through them. Quickly yet quietly she went back inside her room, opening her closet and finding her kirtle. Looking around toHow is my story (draft prologue and first chapter)?It is ok for that it i only a draft. You need to improve your sentence structureHow is my story (draft prologue and first chapter)?its alright for a draft, but some of your sentences are long %26amp;some are choppy. I like the metaphors about the ice! keep writing!How is my story (draft prologue and first chapter)?Wow I liked it a lot you should finish it and maybe send me the final copy.How is my story (draft prologue and first chapter)?wow this is amazing!there are some lines that need some work but this has a lot of potential!
Prologue
The moonlight made everything in the forest silver. The forest was silent, there was no bird song, no crickets, no rustling in the trees. It was as if the moonlight had frozen time itself. There was no movement; it was as if the forest was made of ice.
In the middle of the forest, there was a small pool of water. The pool was coated with a small layer of ice, even though it was summer. The ice wasn’t white; it reflected the moon and the stars as if it was a mirror. This pool was the forest’s centre, no trees grew around the edges of the pool, it was a perfect circle and a circle of trees surrounded it, all the same distance from the water.
It was almost midnight. The moon was full and high in the sky; it was the largest it had ever been in many years. It was a perfect white; the stars around it seemed dimmer.
Suddenly the silence was broken. It was broken with the snapping of a twig. Its small sound echoed around the forest.
Two wolves entered the clearing. One, a pure white she-wolf and the other, a pure black male wolf. The male wolf walked to the opposite side of the clearing, standing in the exact position of south, and the she-wolf stood to the north. They both took a couple of steps forward, their paws almost touching the sides of the pool.
“Kamira, the time has almost come. Are you sure it is tonight?” the black male wolf barked, red eyes gleaming and staring into the she-wolf, Kamira’s green eyes.
“Omatu it is tonight! Don’t question the spirits!” Kamira growled lightly, returning his gaze. Omatu lowered his gaze in a sign of submission. He looked up with a apologetic gaze and Kamira flicked her ear in forgiveness. Omatu took a breath then lightly barked to her,
“Where is the saviour then? It is almost midnight! Where is the human?” Kamira gave a light growl at him. He always asked questions.
“Patience Omatu! There is still time left. The human will come soon.” Omatu growled at Kamira but, without a sign they both disappeared into the shadows simultaneously.
Chapter 1
Yairin sat up straight in her bed. She was in a cold sweat. Her bed clothes were soaked with her sweat. Her dream, she had to remember it. Silently she closed her eyes and tried to cling onto the last snippets of her dream. It was like trying to hold water with your bare hands. All she could remember was that the two wolves in the forest were waiting for something, something very important. Upset at not being able to remember her dream, Yairin got up from her bed.
The sheets were full of her sweat. Oh well, the servants would replace them tomorrow, they always replaced her sheets, even if they were clean. As quietly as she could, Yairin put her feet onto the stone floor, it was made of the finest marble but that didn’t change the fact it was cold. She quickly recoiled her feet and put them into her slippers, the soft fur quickly making her feet warm.
Her mouth emitted a sigh of satisfaction; using her arms she pushed herself out of her huge bed. The sheets were made of the finest cotton, her quilt made by the best quilters. Her feet passed over the carpets, without realising it she was heading towards the window.
Her long slender hands rested against the cold stone ledge. Making sure no one was looking; Yairin took a deep breath and stuck her head out of the window. She closed her eyes and breathed in the freshening night air. She opened her eyes and let out a silent gasp. She had never seen the moon so big and such a pure shade of white! Its light made everything look silver, she imagined how her own, raven black hair must look in this light. She quickly undid her hair bun. Slowly her thick black hair ran down her shoulders, becoming a river of thick wavy black hair. As it stopped unfurling around the small of her back she pulled some so it was in sight of her eyes. ‘That’s strange; my hair is still the same…’ Confused, Yairin looked for the burnt forest. It was always black, but it was a shade of silver. Unconsciously, Yairin looked down at her hands. They weren’t silver; they were the same olive colour they always were.
Still utterly confused she went back inside, and grabbed her hand mirror. She leant out the window again and took a look into the mirror. Her face was still its olive colour; her hair framed it perfectly in black. Her naturally high hair line was considered a rare sign of beauty. Her lips were still the same rose red and her eyes; they were the same ice blue. She closed her eyes and took some deep breaths.
Suddenly a very sharp wind raced through her window. As the wind passed over her ears it seemed to be whispering, ‘The SilverForest…’ Yairin opened her eyes; there was a gleam of determination shining through them. Quickly yet quietly she went back inside her room, opening her closet and finding her kirtle. Looking around toHow is my story (draft prologue and first chapter)?It is ok for that it i only a draft. You need to improve your sentence structureHow is my story (draft prologue and first chapter)?its alright for a draft, but some of your sentences are long %26amp;some are choppy. I like the metaphors about the ice! keep writing!How is my story (draft prologue and first chapter)?Wow I liked it a lot you should finish it and maybe send me the final copy.How is my story (draft prologue and first chapter)?wow this is amazing!there are some lines that need some work but this has a lot of potential!
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